Turns the bathroom sink water on so no one hears you pee nikki

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Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

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When in a public toilet, I never leave the cubicle until everyone is either out of the room or in their own cubicle.

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Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

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When your alone in the house you walk around naked even though there is no point

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Whenever I cross the road with someone I try to walk faster then them just in case a car comes it won't drive me over.

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when i'm in the shower and i close my eyes, i thnk something's gonna be there to scare me when i open my eyes again.

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hold my shirt with my chin when i'm peeing.

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use the restroom at a different floor/building when taking a dump at work.

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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Cry every day just because it makes you feel better.

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When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

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has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

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Brake for tail-gaters

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Trying to take the same number of steps in a block of sidewalk while you're walking.

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blow nose. look at kleenex.

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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Put on different accents, ad talk to my self in the mirror.

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Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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Pick giant boogers and eat them.

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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Hearing someone singing a song and stopping midway, so you need to finish it.

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think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.