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Clarksonisms
Pointless Inventions
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Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.
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-30
When in a public bathroom stall and having to take a number 2 i wait until there is nobody else in there to let it go and also exit the stall.
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-26
When I am walking at night, I see a slight shadow behind me for a second, I walk faster, I see the shadow again, I think it is some kind of scary monster and then I decide to run for my life. When I get back home, I realize the shadow is my shadow.
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-33
I find it really hard to not respond a insulting youtube comment with a hopefully even bigger insult.
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+14
Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4
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-62
When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.
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-17
When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.
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+33
Lie in bed and wonder what happens whe you die, get depressed and come on this site for reassurance
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+150
Reach past the first two or three slices of bread to get the better, fresher bread towards the middle.
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+40
sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..
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-21
send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.
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-57
Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.
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+3
When making something I pretend I'm making a YouTube video of it
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-56
sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.
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-69
act like people from movies or shows just because my life is that boring
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+36
I really enjoy taking a shit and dont really know why.
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-67
wipe the bottle lid before i drink because i dont whant to taste what the other person had in there mouth...
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-55
I laugh easier when im with someone
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-39
read some posts and then sit with friends and try to come up with some good things for this website
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-38
Ever dreamt of being naked and then waking up in horror.
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-129
At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!
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+32
When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.
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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.
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-31
open the fridge A eat food B think
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-83
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.