Whenever I'm holding two round objects, I try to juggle them.

Make hand gestures when talking on phone

I eat one way in public and another way in private.

Realise logically that a chicken egg is her period. we eat chicken periods!

When my soap is running low, I add water to it.

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

Sometimes I lie in bed and wonder what the house would look like upside down.

In a meeting at work, you imagine throwing coffee into your boss's face, just to see what he would do.

When does eating pop corn, take apart the bag and lick all the extra butter.

When I'm on Facebook, I don't like anything in my news feed thats older then 15 minutes or else i'll feel like they think ima creeping on them.

Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

Fart and walk away from the stink area very quickly so nobody will know you made it.

Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

I always have excellent manners when eating around others, but when I'm alone I eat like a pig and have no manners.

sometimes i sing and when i do , i make drum sounds with my teeth and you know, all that stuff

Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

Look at the clock, then instantly forget what time it is and look again.

Having cool food in your house and knowing your boyfriend is going to call you around 6 or so, so you start eating said awesome food at about 5:57. That way when your boyfriend asks what you're doing to can tell him you're eating _____ and he'll want to come over.

Before I go to bed at night, I close the closet door so the monsters inside don't come get me while I'm sleeping.

Open the fridge, nothing there, close fridge, open again just to make sure nothing has magically appeared

Stalk people on facebook, find out something interesting, and later claim that it 'came up on your newsfeed'.

Check the toilet paper after wiping your ass

When tapping, I always have to do the same pattern of taps, and I feel incomplete if I don't finish the pattern I started.

Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.