Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

In school look at the wall or something and feel like only a few seconds has gone by but really thirty minutes has

try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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When using the bathroom count the tiles on the floor or shower wall or read a shampoo bottle.

Pretend that when you are in the shower, the shower head is a giant machine gun, that takes thousands of men to operate, and that you were an extremely large person and you catch ALL of the bullets in your mouth, spitting them at the shower head while at the same time turning off the water as if they all died, and the small drips that continue to drop out were the dead soldires' blood.....-dillon

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

Fap and when you're done you feel ashamed and feel like you're wasting your life lol

Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

When you think thoughts, you think them in complete sentences as if you were saying them and in your accent.

Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

you know how everyone talks about making life decisions in the shower and thinking about life?.....yeah thats me on the toilet

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Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

Liking the smell of your fart and Poo and denying it to people.

Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

in my eyes all my friends have an easier life than myself. their exams are easier, their teacher are cooler...

I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.