Hot in bed? Stick one leg out and then wrap it around the top of the duvet

i just sit there thinking, how is it not butter?

I wonder what a baby is saying when they are telling you off?

Fart at home

Suddenly thinking that this is all a dream, and having to pinch yourself to make sure it isn´t. Or is it?

When I'm getting shouted out i blur my eyes and think of something else :3

When bored, I often fold pieces of paper to make a little point and poke my fingers/hands with it.

Slate the game you playing but always go back for more...ie FIFA, Cod!!!

i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

use the shower water running of my arms and hands to shoot off random hairs inside the shower

If a donkey and a angle fish where to pro create what would be the out come? They can't mate a donkeys a mammal and a angle fish is a fish

every bite i have of a sandwich, i need to have a sip of a flavored drink to "soften the bread and make it taste good".

Sometimes when I'm in the shower, I start kicking the bar of soap.

Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

fap

Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

Try to pee on the toilet-paper in the toilet so it rips in half

Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

when the teacher is asking the class something and i have no idea I'm looking at the paper in front of me, pretending to still making notes and thinking to myself 'don't take me, don't take me...'

Think up a come back three days after it would have been useful.

I pretend I'm a musical when I'm alone and sing about all the stuff I'm doing.

avoid going in the handicap bathroom stall because you're afraid someone will see you cause it's so big

Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.