Pretend animals talk to you!

I violate and then kill people, all ages and kinds... ..:But everyone does that right? I mean... Lol, I just type that because I am insecure now, and I kill when I am insecure... ...Excuse me.

When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

Being from another country and always thinking in english.

At home stay on the toilet a few minutes after you finish your business

I feel bad for not reading the terms of service on a website, because someone had to put a lot of effort into that.

I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

Courtesy flush.

I eat ice creams from the bottom of the cone to the top.

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

When I'm riding in a car, i squeeze my toes everytime the car passes a dotted line in the road or when theres a curb

Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

Feel uncomfortable with the TV volume on an odd number

Reading all these posts and being reminded that we are all more similar to each other than we think, regardless of whatever group each of us may belong to.

I have seen one of my submissions listed under "Quotes from other sites"

I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.

Go outside and pee.

laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

Fake a yawn to see if other people will yawn back.

look at bins as i walk past them

I like eating chicken clubs with my hands and dip them in ketchup while pretending I am a caveman

Had a dream within a dream, just like Inception. You woke up and it felt so real you were sure of it. Then a bit later you wake up again.

in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.