When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

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When I stop thinking about about something it'll turn out that I've been staring at someone without meaning to.

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apparently you turn or twist everything to tight like a sink or a bottlecap ect. "i cant open the bottle of fu***ng coke becase you "

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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if im alone and singing to music, i watch myself in the mirror

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in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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When I'm trying to sleep and my mind's like, "Hey, know what's a good movie? Paranormal Activity!" Then I can't sleep for an hour - Brayden Everes

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Daydream about doing unspeakable things(killing, raping, beating, cutting, shooting, ect.) to the person you hate

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When I am home alone and I hear something upstairs, I pretend my Dad is here and say really loudly, "Hey Dad! When are you going to your violent national wrestling match tonight?!"

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Wearing cheap CZ rings to either stop guys hitting on me or pretend I'm engaged.

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sleep with your legs crossed like your meditating.

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

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Live in a house my whole life and still not know what switch does which

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I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

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I trap my farts under the covers and sniff them all up or cup them in my hand and sniff real hard to get the smell.

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Call the ninja turtles by their full names.

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Wonder why every single kid is looking at you in a restaurant.

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listen to madonnas new album

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.