I always feel a little twinge of regret when I see "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service," because I know it's a lie.

When realizing i'm being a little bitchy, I laugh and smile right after my sentence to make myself seem a little nicer.

I use chopsticks or disposable latex gloves to eat sandwiches, chocolate, basically any finger food, because in my opinion, it's impossible to get that greasy, sticky film off my fingers.

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

when I need to do a number 2 in a public toilet I put toilet paper in there first so my neighbours cant hear it.

when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

Get turned on lookin at my own butt

get scarred shit less when some one burst though your door when it tacky

worry about other people hearing you pee when your in the bathroom.

I rape small children ;).

pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

Thinking of something but got distracted for a few seconds. After that, I forgot what was I thinking about.

Look at a word and count the letters by 2's - continue counting the letters over and over by 2's until it comes out even at the end of the word.

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

wondering if everyone else in the world can read your mind so you avoid thinking about specific things

I somtimes think about what I would o if I had a wish and I go into a lot of detail about it in my head and then realize it will never actually happen

watch raindrops race down a window and see which one wins

At the peak of orgasm, i used to think that im making out with someone else (like my crush) to make me cum.

I like to swallow great ammounts of water just to make the loud "clunk" sound in my throat.

i run my 2 fingers across a wall like they're ninja feet when im happy.

At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

Take baths

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.