I always feel a little twinge of regret when I see "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service," because I know it's a lie.

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When realizing i'm being a little bitchy, I laugh and smile right after my sentence to make myself seem a little nicer.

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I use chopsticks or disposable latex gloves to eat sandwiches, chocolate, basically any finger food, because in my opinion, it's impossible to get that greasy, sticky film off my fingers.

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I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

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when I need to do a number 2 in a public toilet I put toilet paper in there first so my neighbours cant hear it.

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when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

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Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

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When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

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Get turned on lookin at my own butt

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get scarred shit less when some one burst though your door when it tacky

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worry about other people hearing you pee when your in the bathroom.

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I rape small children ;).

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pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

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Thinking of something but got distracted for a few seconds. After that, I forgot what was I thinking about.

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Look at a word and count the letters by 2's - continue counting the letters over and over by 2's until it comes out even at the end of the word.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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wondering if everyone else in the world can read your mind so you avoid thinking about specific things

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I somtimes think about what I would o if I had a wish and I go into a lot of detail about it in my head and then realize it will never actually happen

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watch raindrops race down a window and see which one wins

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At the peak of orgasm, i used to think that im making out with someone else (like my crush) to make me cum.

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I like to swallow great ammounts of water just to make the loud "clunk" sound in my throat.

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i run my 2 fingers across a wall like they're ninja feet when im happy.

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At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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Take baths

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.