I have a cat that drops on it's side when she sees me coming

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I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

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When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

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Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

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When I'm home alone, I get paranoid and think that someone is watching me and I try to act cool and funny just to impress them.

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When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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when two pictures look very similar, i go back and forth between them so it looks like they're moving

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when singing to music on my ipod, i sometimes pause the music to hear how loud I am singing.

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Checking out peoples cars to try and figure out what kind of driver they are.

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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When I walk into the bathroom and the lid of toilet is closed, I always get slightly nervous to lift it up and see into the toilet. I'm always thinking there'll be something disgusting or scary in there.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

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.don't like something because being scared that it appears on my wall.

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Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

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When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.