After using the restroom at someone's house I turn on the water and proceed to check myself in the mirror while the water runs and sounds like I'm washing my hands then I turn off the water and walk out.

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I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

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I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

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Check the time on my cell phone, put it back in my pocket. Dammit, didn't see the time. Check it again.

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When I notice that I have just breathed in/out, for the next minute or so I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to keep breathing.

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Sometimes I wipe my butt so violently that my finger goes through the toilet paper and into my butt hole. I enjoy it and question my sexuality. ;)

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Apply hand sanitizer after fapping.

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THINK OF SOMETHING WEIRD YOU DO TO PUT ON THIS WEBSITE ONLY TO END UP FORGETTING IT BEFORE YOU GET ON THE COMPUTER

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Eat something to pass the time while I wait for my food in the microwave to be cooked.

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You pause while walking around your house when you're home alone because you think you heard a noise, but then realize it was just you walking.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

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When drunk, I often grab something, lift it into the air, and yell "I GOT THE POWER!" just in case it turns me into He-Man.

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i smoke weed all day.

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Thinking you smell really bad and then putting to much deodorant/perfume/ect and you still think you smell bad. Is this just me?

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I look for comments in this site that are on or close to 0 so that when i like or dislike them, i make a difference to the outcome :)

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When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

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I like to swallow great ammounts of water just to make the loud "clunk" sound in my throat.

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Always coming up with a really great comeback in my head 5 seconds too late. And then playing out what would have happened if I had said it.

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Get the feeling that somebody is going to grab your foot when you walk by a bed in the dark...

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really wonder why there is so much talk about pooping and farting on this site

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Have a fantasy where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart while Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum.

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sometimes i wonder how it would be to think in another language and i try but cant

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.