Pretend animals talk to you!

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I violate and then kill people, all ages and kinds... ..:But everyone does that right? I mean... Lol, I just type that because I am insecure now, and I kill when I am insecure... ...Excuse me.

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When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

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Being from another country and always thinking in english.

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At home stay on the toilet a few minutes after you finish your business

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I feel bad for not reading the terms of service on a website, because someone had to put a lot of effort into that.

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I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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Courtesy flush.

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I eat ice creams from the bottom of the cone to the top.

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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When I'm riding in a car, i squeeze my toes everytime the car passes a dotted line in the road or when theres a curb

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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Feel uncomfortable with the TV volume on an odd number

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Reading all these posts and being reminded that we are all more similar to each other than we think, regardless of whatever group each of us may belong to.

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I have seen one of my submissions listed under "Quotes from other sites"

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.

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Go outside and pee.

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laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

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Fake a yawn to see if other people will yawn back.

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look at bins as i walk past them

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I like eating chicken clubs with my hands and dip them in ketchup while pretending I am a caveman

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Had a dream within a dream, just like Inception. You woke up and it felt so real you were sure of it. Then a bit later you wake up again.

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in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.