when I go shopping I go in the store, get what I need and then I leave I don't browse.

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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While driving out in the country area, I am secretly looking for Squatch

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Sometimes when I look at a clock the seconds hand ticks backwards

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Watching tv with family/friends and laughing at something on the show, and then feeling awkward because no one else laughed.

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Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I apologize, when i bump against things.

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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When sitting with my laptop on the sofa, and a family member is watching TV in the same room, chuckle occasionally at the screen, just so they know you're not watching porn or something.

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Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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when im in a public toilet and my freinds outside i make loud converstation with them so they cant hear me pee.

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i feel relived after i prick and see that hard-white thinggy that oozes outside my annoying acne.

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While in bed, I cover my head with my bed sheets because it makes me feel safe from monsters.

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When you can't use your hand to push a door, kick it and say "THIS IS SPARTA!!!"

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I mustn't step on the cracks in the pavement

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Get scared of the dark while in bed, so you make sure all limbs are tucked nice and tight under the covers. Once done, you now feel safe..

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Pretend that when you are in the shower, the shower head is a giant machine gun, that takes thousands of men to operate, and that you were an extremely large person and you catch ALL of the bullets in your mouth, spitting them at the shower head while at the same time turning off the water as if they all died, and the small drips that continue to drop out were the dead soldires' blood.....-dillon

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feel legitimately bad for Wile E Coyote whenever he does not get the road runner

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Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.