Have deja vu while talking to someone and then stop listening to what they are saying for a few seconds till the feeling passes, then nod like you have been listening the whole time.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

thumb_up thumb_down -42

always check thde back seat before starting the car

thumb_up thumb_down -58

After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

When I use the bathroom at school, I keep the door open with the kickstand and use the stall. It's because I fear that one day, when I'm all alone in the bathroom with the door closed, the fire alarm will go off and scare the living crap out of me. This trick backfires when someone comes in without closing the door and uses the urinal.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Eat ice by itself

thumb_up thumb_down -47

getting self conscious when wearing a hoodie because you start pitting out and you can start to smell BO...

thumb_up thumb_down -43

I always walk down the hall James Bond style. Gun out, along the wall, looking around corners before I walk into or by a room.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When im in a public toilet, i try not to make any sounds when taking a crap, not even a fart, so that when i come out no one will think i was taking a crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

pretend you died to see what your dog would do.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

When i close the refrigiator door, i re-open it and give it a good shove to make sure it tight.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Write "my opinion thinking-aloud-sentences" on the "circle the answer" test as footnotes when I'm not sure about the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

I push the door open with my stomach

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I suck my shirt without realizing im doing it until people tell me.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whenever I send or receive texts, I always make it a point to have more received texts than sent ones. It makes me feel popular.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

When I'm alone I occasionally like to give a little hump to the air. Not for sexual reasons or anything, just because it feels right.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Try to fly by jumping and then discover you can't

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If I have a cold or runny nose, when I'm alone I stuff tissues in my nostrils so I don't have to keep blowing my nose sooooo much.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

When your sitting on the toilet you watch a video,or read something on your ipod/ipad/etc

thumb_up thumb_down +156

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.