Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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read on youtube comments with too unlikes

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Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

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take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

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At the peak of orgasm, i used to think that im making out with someone else (like my crush) to make me cum.

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

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Roll my eyes with them closed when I am annoyed with someone

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fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

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arrange certain social situations with attractive girls just to make spank bank deposits.

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Checking your phone for a text when you know you don't have one. Matt

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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When you're all alone, practice for an interview you're bound to have when you're rich and famous and say other people's responses when they are asked about working with you.

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I sometimes wonder if im a baby and my whole life is just a big dream

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I try to fill the surface of the toilet water with bubbles when I pee.

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When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other in the same way just to be fair to both hands

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When something weird happens I nod in agreement.

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wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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Show desktop when mom or dad walks in.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.