Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

read on youtube comments with too unlikes

Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

At the peak of orgasm, i used to think that im making out with someone else (like my crush) to make me cum.

I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

Roll my eyes with them closed when I am annoyed with someone

fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

arrange certain social situations with attractive girls just to make spank bank deposits.

Checking your phone for a text when you know you don't have one. Matt

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

When you're all alone, practice for an interview you're bound to have when you're rich and famous and say other people's responses when they are asked about working with you.

I sometimes wonder if im a baby and my whole life is just a big dream

I try to fill the surface of the toilet water with bubbles when I pee.

When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other in the same way just to be fair to both hands

When something weird happens I nod in agreement.

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

Show desktop when mom or dad walks in.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.