I have autofocus in my eyes.

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I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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Every once in a while I think 'I know you're reading my mind...' and look about the classroom. See if anyone looks at me.

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Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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Sometimes, I ask myself philosophical questions. The one that is bugging me now is "If reincarnation is real, why is this life so vivid?"

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

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I eat ass

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You know how there is that sound that gives you the shiver? Whenever you here it you shiver and tell that sound maker to shut up, but then can't stop thinking about that sound and find people looking at you and saying "Is it really that cold?" And then you stop thinking about the sound. P.S. I would like to say I have never relized how weird I am! This site has revealed my inner weirdness! -Astrid

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I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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Get annoyed when you are making a new account and it sends you bafk because of credit card or email address

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Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

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When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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Think about what you're going to tell your kids about your childhood when you grow-up.

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Sometimes cringe at the sound when other people scratch themselves

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I wonder why people were happy after the last election

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.