Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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When I walk into the bathroom and the lid of toilet is closed, I always get slightly nervous to lift it up and see into the toilet. I'm always thinking there'll be something disgusting or scary in there.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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.don't like something because being scared that it appears on my wall.

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Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

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When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

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When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

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I put my finger in jars of jam/yoghurt/honey etc then lick the finger and repeat and hope nobody see's me.

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I play video games with the controller under the covers.

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Check your analog watch, wait for it to strike a minute, then look away and try to count 60 seconds out in your head before you look again. However many seconds you were away is your new record.

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Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

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When sitting with my laptop on the sofa, and a family member is watching TV in the same room, chuckle occasionally at the screen, just so they know you're not watching porn or something.

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In my head, my life is some kind of on-going documentary about my life. Sometimes when I'm alone, I conduct interviews.

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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i always fall in my imaginations. whenever i think of something, e.g me walking to my room, i'd fall on my way there. what's wrong with me.....

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Sometimes after a long, hard day or when something bad happens I just sit down and cry in the shower.

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I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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This song will not come out of my head!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.