Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

Make up a song to yourself.

Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

Download a new app, and say to myself I'll never stop playing it. Play it for 2 hours and forget about it.

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

Looking at these in school when it's dead silent and trying so hard not to laugh so you won't get yelled at.

When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

Think about when im old and im dying and under what circumstances,and think will i remember this day when i thought of it and think,shit that was fast,almost like sending myself a message to the future...if that makes any sense lol

Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

Whenever I switch sides on my bed, I feel like when I turn around some scary clown face is going to be RIGHT THERE in my face

Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.

Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

Run the shower before you get in/ move out the way of the water to let it warm up first

I wipe the part of the glass or water bottle i drink from

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when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.