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Whenever i am watching TV my parents always walk by at the worst part like a sex scene or a dirty joke.

When you're full at a restaurant and leave your drink. One day you're thirsty and remember back to when you COULD have finished that drink.

When bored in class.. I catch eyes with someone across the room and look away fast, then act "cool" for the next 10 minutes because I still think they're looking at me...

I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

I have never watched Star Wars.

Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

Pick giant boogers and eat them.

when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

When i'm eating M&Ms, I save one of each color until the end so I can eat them all at once.

in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

Say "ow" when I drop something or before I get hurt

Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

never feel sad enough after being told a sad story

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.