Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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open the fridge A eat food B think

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Hate using public bathrooms because everyone can hear you pee.

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I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

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think about what im gonna say abillon times in my head before i say it -jesse

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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something happens with a person that u were close to but then they become an asshole, u get mad, and when u stop talking feel really depressed even though u hate them

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Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

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After reading certain things on this website, I try them to see if they work.

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no magazine on toilet? read shampoo bottle

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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Do a light cough when in the toilet when there isn't no lock on the door so Ur stop someone walking in!!!

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When taking trash up to the street, I always runback as fast as I can, counting down from 5, pretending there's a sniper about to shoot me.

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Writing d as b and b as d or p as q

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when i get pissed off at someone i go to an empty room and then imagine killing them

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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I am wearing ear buds even though I'm not actually listening to anything.

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When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

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refuse to like a post because the number is too perfect and you don't want to screw it up

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Secretly open a packet of something or spray some deodorant in a shop to check what it looks/feels/smells like. Then put it back and pick up the one behind because you just used/opened the one you were just holding.

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I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

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Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

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Not eat French fries because I don't like the taste rather than because they are unhealthy?

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pee in the side of the toilet so its not as loud.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.