play with a knife and pretend to be a master blade wielder

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When I have headphones in, I wonder if my swallowing is extremely loud for everyone else too.

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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When I'm cooking, I mumble everything I'm doing under my breath like I'm in a cooking show and I'm talking to the audience.

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

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getting self conscious when wearing a hoodie because you start pitting out and you can start to smell BO...

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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Look at the time but have to look again 3 seconds later because you forgot.

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Try to see nipples through body paint.

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chew on the side of my teeth

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When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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make food scream if i chop them up.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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Before I go to bed at night, I close the closet door so the monsters inside don't come get me while I'm sleeping.

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Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

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say "ow" when your character in a video game gets hurt

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When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.