Slate the game you playing but always go back for more...ie FIFA, Cod!!!

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I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

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i use dental dams

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when my parents are gone i shout random stuff

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

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Write things on this site, because i cant sleep

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Try to see nipples through body paint.

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after having a hot shower I sometimes just sit in my room wearing just a towel

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When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

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Everytime I look at the clock it see so say 4 20 9 11 or 11 11

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Smell a fart and don't react until someone else does.

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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Seeing a cartoon character eat something makes me hungry for it even though it may not taste good in real life and I know that.

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interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.