getting self conscious when wearing a hoodie because you start pitting out and you can start to smell BO...

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On an one night if I come too fast .je persuade the girl that I have to forget my cellular in my automobile and I get out

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if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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Sometimes when I touch something I have to touch all of the object and with both hands, otherwise I feel incomplete.

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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sometimes when I listen to a song while riding in the car I look out the window and pretend I'm in some angsty music video

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Sometimes I wipe my butt so violently that my finger goes through the toilet paper and into my butt hole. I enjoy it and question my sexuality. ;)

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When I'm on Facebook, I flip between someone's most recent profile picture and their first one, just to see how much they've changed.

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Think of the best come-backs ever, a few seconds after the time to use them would be.

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Sometimes when I'm sitting next to a random person having a conversation with them (in the car for instance) I imagine myself reaching out and holding their hand. I then get super embarrassed just for having the thought.

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Realizing that when you look behind a shower curtain before using the bathroom and actually see a Serial killer, you have no plan...

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Think "When are we ever going to use this in our life?" while sitting bored in school.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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I control water in the shower.

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When im going from one room to the next, i try and get into the other room before the door to the last room closes. If i do, I've won.

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Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

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when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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Hearing someone singing a song and stopping midway, so you need to finish it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.