When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

Pretend I'm a back-up dancer or singing a duet with the singer of the song I'm listening to.

You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

Force a piss out really hard because you're in a rush.

Wait until there is nobody in the bathroom and then fart really really loud. Also I flip my pillow every 10 minutes so my head is on the cold side. (try it some time)

When I am bored I look at things and wonder about the people who made them, and at what time they were made, etc. Like whether my Bic pen was made in the morning or the night. Savy.

misread flashlight

Shake my hands frantically back and forth when watching the microwave count down or the printer print, as if it will make them go faster.

Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

setting your alarm early so that when you wake up you see you still have time to sleep and you're like YES!!!

I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.