Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

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Has anyone else ever wondered why the women in shows and movies lie with the blanket covering them after apparently having sex with the other person.

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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invent arguments in my head with people to hone my debate skills for future arguments.

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Feel like you sing wonderfully when you are alone, but feel like you sing horribly in front of others.

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Clicking Yes to "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service" without reading one word of that stupid thing.

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I keep tearing the little piece of skin next to my thumb nail until it hurts - and even if it bleeds I have to get it off.

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Wish that Mexicans would go fix things in their own country instead of coming here unwelcome and demanding things instead.

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Pretend to talk on the phone when you see someone you don't want to say hello.

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I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

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When I have a bottle in my hand and nothing to do in class. I read the nutrition facts and ingredients 2 to 4 times until the teacher says something.

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Stepping on people's feet when I approach to kiss/hug/say hi to them.

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chewing icecream before you swallow it

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Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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Thinking you could be in a "Truman Show" style scenario and scanning areas of your house and possessions for tiny little cameras and microphones.

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When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

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arrange certain social situations with attractive girls just to make spank bank deposits.

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I feel like my blanket is an indestructible shield against any monsters that might try to get me at night. If any part of you is out of the covers, you're screwed. lol -ML

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I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

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I constantly get itches. On awkward parts of my body. In public places. And it's torture.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.