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Things You Think Only You Do
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When I notice that I have just breathed in/out, for the next minute or so I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to keep breathing.
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-68
When I am making toast I spread the butter or jam with a spoon
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-18
When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"
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-86
Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.
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-16
Turn on the faucet and/or fan when using the toilet at someone else's house or at my own place when there is a visitor because I don't want them to hear me peeing.
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-63
When I climb into bed every night, I always say, "Bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed," while shifting until I am comfortablely settled. -Ikka
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-58
I prefer to masturbate by putting a fleshlight under my stuffed-toy smurfette's dress and pretend to smurf her.
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-52
Spray my perfume under my arms so if I sweat then it smells like perfume.
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-88
On an one night if I come too fast .je persuade the girl that I have to forget my cellular in my automobile and I get out
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-69
Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.
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-53
Realise logically that a chicken egg is her period. we eat chicken periods!
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-54
When the car runs over bumps in the road on the freeway, they sound like horses hooves, so I pretend my car's being pulled by invisible horses.
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-16
Sing really loudly and think you hear someone come in. yell "hello" for five minutes before singing again.
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+50
When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......
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+38
Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.
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-54
Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.
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-43
watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture
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-8
I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.
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-23
start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.
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-59
think that the whole world is a dollhouse and we are being controlled by giant people above who live in a whole differnt world
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-32
When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"
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-28
Avoid as many television commercials as I can
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-26
in my mind prisms are called pink floyd.
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-51
Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.
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-31
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.