At night when alone in my bed...I sometimes pretend like I got hit by a car or something, and my loved one is there with me...and I act out my last words...and how I would act. I've done this occasionally since I was 5. With different scenario's. Schmee

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Sometimes I walk around my house with my eyes closed and pretend I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

thumb_up thumb_down -4

~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

thumb_up thumb_down -80

always hurt urself and blame the object for hurting u

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAPFAP FAP ::TROLLFACE::

thumb_up thumb_down -89

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

pleasure my self... because I didn't they automatically censored certain words

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Read this site's posts, think of something awesome to write but then forget it because you decided to read more and finish the page rather than write it immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Sometimes I make awkward eye contact with strangers. And I quickly look away. And then I look back. And then look away again. And I keep being compelled to stare awkwardly at the random stranger for no reason.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Walking around store and store clerk asks are you finding everything ok..and you reply yes and you...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

thumb_up thumb_down -80

sleep with your legs crossed like your meditating.

thumb_up thumb_down -81

Laying or sitting down in a really comfy position, then getting up to do something, and when you come back you can't figure out the position you just had.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

I use chopsticks or disposable latex gloves to eat sandwiches, chocolate, basically any finger food, because in my opinion, it's impossible to get that greasy, sticky film off my fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

Find yourself alone at a party/gathering of some sort... Pretend to send a text to make people think you're not a loner.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

Sitting on a table at school and looking at the things u only think i do website

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.