Think up a come back three days after it would have been useful.

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When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other in the same way just to be fair to both hands

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I always feel a little twinge of regret when I see "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service," because I know it's a lie.

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Thinking you can do parkour even when you cant and the have a friend over and try to show off

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While peeing, I will sometimes flush the toilet mid-stream and see if I can finish before it flushes all the way.

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when someone mispronounces something I say the correct pronunciation quietly under my breath so it doesn't bother me

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Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

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When I'm trying to sleep if both my legs are under the duvet it's too warm. Both legs out it's too cold. When I have one leg out and on the duvet it's just right. I sometimes also put my leg against the wall when it's cold.

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When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

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After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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I put my finger in jars of jam/yoghurt/honey etc then lick the finger and repeat and hope nobody see's me.

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Search up google on bing or yahoo because i feel that google is so much better

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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I talk to myself when I'm alone

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Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

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TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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In school look at the wall or something and feel like only a few seconds has gone by but really thirty minutes has

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

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See someone thats so hot all you can think about is seeing them naked all day.

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When Ive just intentionally committed some minor traffic offense (speeding, illegal U-turn) and suddenly worry a cop may have spotted me and act to myself in the car as if I was truly confused and have no idea what I did wrong, like moving my head around and saying, "Huh? Where's that house?"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.