Mayada stupid

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Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

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When its nighttime, you walk around the house with one of your small animals in your arms, like it can protect you from anything

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Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

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Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

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When talking to someone you sometimes start with the middle of a story through the end, complete with random details that seem totally unrelated to them, and THEN you remember to tell the beginning (which is the part that actually relates to what they were talking about).

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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when i'm at the computer i say out of loud what i'm typing

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Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

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whenever you walk into the bathroom with your phone/laptop/electronic device you stay sitting on the toilet even though you are done because you are so engaged with whatever you are doing

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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After washing butt, turn my butt towards the shower and spread butt cheeks apart to wash the soap out of my crack.

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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When sitting with my laptop on the sofa, and a family member is watching TV in the same room, chuckle occasionally at the screen, just so they know you're not watching porn or something.

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Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

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Play as both sides on fifa

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Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

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Realize you are dreaming and try to wake yourself up.

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getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

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Turns the bathroom sink water on so no one hears you pee nikki

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Randomly agree for the Terms of Service for just about everything on the internet. Then becoming very frightened at the thought that you have violated them in some way.

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.