try to count down when the school be is going to ring.

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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trip over nothing. break into spontaneous dancing.

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Walking past a light switch, but miss when try to turn the lights on so you just keep walking instead.

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Realizing that when you look behind a shower curtain before using the bathroom and actually see a Serial killer, you have no plan...

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1.Open the fridge...nothing to eat :/ 2.Open the cabinet...nothing to eat :/ 3.Lower expectations..and then repeat :)

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Go into a shop that you thought would have some interesting things, but when you find that it dosn't, you quickly browse the shop for a bit so that you don't offend the cashier by entering and leaving immediately.

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Sex scene comes on TV while you are watching with your parents... Try to act normal... Fail.

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I buy books and never read them and get mad at myself for doing so.

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I imagine myself dying in the worst possible way more than once a day. I don't know...today, I was driving on a bridge and all I could picture was it collapsing and falling onto me, When I'm lying in bed, I imagine my ceiling fan toppling me.

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I click my teeth to music

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I chew on anything plastic. I don't think there's a pen that I haven't chewed on or a plastic cap I haven't put in my mouth. It's a horrible habit but it feels so DAMN GOOD TO CHEW!

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Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

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I think I have superpowers and sometimes I try to use them by force, like lifting a pencil with my mind or elevate from the ground.

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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When you tell yourself that this is the last page you'll read and end up reading three more.

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I only EVER take my watch off if I need tto put on big gloves, like cricket gloves.

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Look at restaurant signs and realize the font isnt as fancy as you once thought

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Not doing any work Feel guilty about it Then still do no work

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I will look up the definition of a word in a text message before I use it just incase I'm using it in the wrong context.

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If you see someone singing in a car, then search on the radio stations to find the matching song to the the miming you see.

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use the shower water running of my arms and hands to shoot off random hairs inside the shower

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Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.