Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

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I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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when something is lost you check the spot they or it should be at least 5 to 10 times

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Reading the terms of service :O....

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when liking something you like or dislike something you click it twice even though you know it will only take one vote

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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In school look at the wall or something and feel like only a few seconds has gone by but really thirty minutes has

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After eating a lot of junk food begin to fear that i'm going to get diabetes.

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

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Own all of you hard! Moral: EXPLOSION NOISE!

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strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

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Whenever your going down a flight of stairs with two rails, hold the two rails and go from the top step to the bottom.

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Count how long it takes before you stop peeing.

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Write things in the air with my finger, and then erase the words with my hand.

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When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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use cleverbot to chat to automated dating chat bots. even if i don't understand swedish.

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Think that the shirts and bras that the girl you like should have never ben invented for that one specific person

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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Sometimes I stay as still as I can and stare at myself in the mirror until it scares me and I freak out about who I am and why I'm living. I have to think of my family and memories to snap out of it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.