I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

When someone is reading something I have to read it at sonic speed in my head before they get to the end and if i dont do it in time I get angry.

After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

Listen to song and think of a great montage that would go with it.

Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

sometimes if I am going on a flight to another country I will hold a small pocket of air in my mouth before getting on the plane and then I would let it out after we land

when playing games like grand theft auto I drive normally like all the other people in the game when i'm bored

I set my alarm clock early just so I can get up snooze it.... One, two, three, maybe even four times.

get really confused

If there's a mirror i look if there's people around looking at me, and if there aren't it's ok to stare at my reflection.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.