I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

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When someone is reading something I have to read it at sonic speed in my head before they get to the end and if i dont do it in time I get angry.

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

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I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

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You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Listen to song and think of a great montage that would go with it.

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Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

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Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

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When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

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sometimes if I am going on a flight to another country I will hold a small pocket of air in my mouth before getting on the plane and then I would let it out after we land

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when playing games like grand theft auto I drive normally like all the other people in the game when i'm bored

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I set my alarm clock early just so I can get up snooze it.... One, two, three, maybe even four times.

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get really confused

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If there's a mirror i look if there's people around looking at me, and if there aren't it's ok to stare at my reflection.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.