reading the back of the cereal box when eating cereal

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When your sitting on the toilet you watch a video,or read something on your ipod/ipad/etc

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Read what other people do that you don't, and think how weird that person must be.

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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Whenever someone is making a speech, I imagine them being taken out by a sniper mid-speech...

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

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Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Watching tv with family/friends and laughing at something on the show, and then feeling awkward because no one else laughed.

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I seriously contemplate what my theme song would be. I imagine it would have no words and a slight Mission Impossible influence.

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Get scared while I'm doing things on the computer like writing these comments, or other weird stuff because I think there might be a hacker watching my screen.

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Scratch my ass/armpit and HAVE to smell it.

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Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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get home from work and masturbate instantly

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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When standing on the beach, I try to command the waves to stop.

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When bored, I often fold pieces of paper to make a little point and poke my fingers/hands with it.

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Sometimes I look at a digital clock and try to force the numbers to change with the power of my mind.

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Saying or doing something stupid, then later replaying it in your head and wanting to punch yourself in the face for it, then coming up with different ideas on how you could have been less stupid. -B

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Try to talk to my pet telepathically. - sky

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Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.