oh snap, i got a boner. hope nobody notices

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I cant ride a bike

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laziness .... its all in the mind

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

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Happy April 28th everyone! Today is the first day of the rest of your lives, a time for new beginnings to run wild, a time to put a final ending to the past mistakes and troubling thoughts that may have been clouding your mind for far too long until now... The time is here, The time is now, Today is the day, Right here, right now, Right this moment, This is the right time... This, IS THE TIME TO DECIDE... To take time to make time, and let time pass by while you try to decide on how you wanna live your life? Falling into the same patterns as time before, and as will be, time after time? OR, simply, you can choose to LIVE... letting yourself have the time of YOUR LIFE!!! =) The choice is yours, what will you decide??? <3

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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You come across a movie on network television, you own it, you can see the DVD on the shelf, it would take you less then 30 seconds to put the DVD on, instead you watch it on that station, commercials and all.

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When someone is reading something I have to read it at sonic speed in my head before they get to the end and if i dont do it in time I get angry.

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

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feel disappointed when i find out that a p0rn scene is just the actor's dream or imagination.

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Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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Giving my dog a massage.

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Rapidly click the mouse when your computer is frozen, even though you know it won't do anything to help whatsoever.

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look around my house for something to do for what feels like an hour then look back at a clock to realize thats its only been 4 minutes

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Think "When are we ever going to use this in our life?" while sitting bored in school.

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Love an outfit on others/mannequin, but hate it on me!

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Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

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I chew around the center of carrots.

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Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.