I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

When I haven't looked in a mirror for a while, I worry that I look awful, and when I get to a mirror, I'm like "Oh yeah, that's what I look like".

When I wear a backpack I constantly check to make sure all the pockets are zipped

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

Drinking and dialing people I dated.

Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

Check an insane amount of times to see if the door is locked, then finally get back to jerking off.

Burp, and then automatically say burp afterwards.

When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.