Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

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I've had a problem all my life with people thinking I'm a boy, (I'm a girl) so when I first meet someone, my instinct is to find some reason, (however stupid) to say that I'm a girl, (EX: "Can you believe that people actually think I'm a boy?" like when I just meet them).

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get home from work and masturbate instantly

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Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

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Open the fridge, nothing there, close fridge, open again just to make sure nothing has magically appeared

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Think of numbers as male or female.

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find a nice photograph of food from the web and post it on fb just to watch my retard friends make a big deal out of it.

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run up the stairs when its night so that the monsters dont catch you

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i smoke weed all day.

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I try to fill the surface of the toilet water with bubbles when I pee.

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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Reading the things people post on here and realising your not as weird as you thought.

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If there's leaves on the ground and the wind picks it up and makes like swirls I put my arms out to make it seem I'm controlling the swirls.

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A bee flies into your classroom and you're too terrified to focus on anything else.

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Everytime I look at the clock it see so say 4 20 9 11 or 11 11

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In school trying to do a small fart because it really hurting and suddnly a earthquake happens

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When in class , I move alot in my chair when my butt itches .

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listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word

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Rapidly click the mouse when your computer is frozen, even though you know it won't do anything to help whatsoever.

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You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

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Before I go to bed at night, I close the closet door so the monsters inside don't come get me while I'm sleeping.

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When sitting with my laptop on the sofa, and a family member is watching TV in the same room, chuckle occasionally at the screen, just so they know you're not watching porn or something.

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I like to sleep on the floor; my my cushion is too soft.

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When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.