You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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When no one is around I make sound effects for everything I do.

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In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

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When walking on an old looking bridge I try to get off quickly and before anyone else gets on there because all I can think about is it giving way and me falling to my death/being very wet

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Sometimes when im sitting in class i start thinking how i would save the whole classroom if someone was to come in with a gun and start shooting.

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When I forget to brush my teeth, scrape off the plaque on my teeth with my fingernail.

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Thinking that someone is seeing everything from your eyes while you are using the bathroom, and then quickly looking up to avoid embarassment.

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use my phone as an alarm clock for waking up. but sets the time in PM instead of AM.

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misread flashlight

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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Post on this website, then give yourself the first thumbs up to kick-start your success.

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I always cry when I pray.

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When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

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When I'm fighting with someone and I've ran out of good points, I just start making random noises.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

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I Masturbate Daily.

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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I like to watch lava lamps heat up

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.