Looking at this naked with a cat on you're lap.

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R A P E Children

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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When i'm in a classroom I think about all of the possible ways to save everyone if something bad happens.

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Sometimes, when I like something on a certain website and see that someone else on my facebook friend's list likes it as well, I think that they're stalking me.

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worry about other people hearing you pee when your in the bathroom.

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Secretly open a packet of something or spray some deodorant in a shop to check what it looks/feels/smells like. Then put it back and pick up the one behind because you just used/opened the one you were just holding.

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I can see a magic eye image

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

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When I'm watching a youtube video, I worry about how much time is left because I'm concerned the video maker won't wrap it up in time before the video ends.

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get annoyed by people singing a song only to show off their brilliant voice and automatically think that they cannot sing as good as they think they can

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(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

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Having a deja vu, swearing you've seen something before.

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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Waking up from a really bad dream that you thought was real and then thinking about it all day worried that it actually happened

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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I yawn on command… and hate it. –Ikka

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waking up from an amazing/awesome dream and spend the rest of the day thinking up of new senarios to come after...

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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When I am bored, I imagine saving my crush' s life and we live happily ever after. :( what an idiot I am

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.