I can't help spitting into the toilet when I piss, let it drop out my mouth and hit the water to see if I can get it in the center.

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I have to keep reading website pages until I reached 5, 10, 15 etc. When I get close to my age though, I can finish there.

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Constantly check your post on here to see if other people give it a response.

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When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

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Use more toilet paper than you need, just because you feel like it cleans your ass more.

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Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

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Get my belt loop caught on the door handle,

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moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

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Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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Flexing your abs when you put on deodorant so you dont look fat

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Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

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I put morals on posts to get a thumbs up. Moral: Posts with morals get thumbs up.

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I masturbate with sandpaper

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Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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When In the car, use th bug guts to ramp up all of the culverts and when you don't have a landing for a while, pretend that you got a speed bonus and are soaring with some amazing air.-dillon

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i have my own way of eating every chocolate bar i eat, layer by layer

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Say you're not hungry at a friend's house when his/her parents offer you food, even though you're starving

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Take a dump in the dark... Anyone but me?

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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always picture someone naked even though sometime you really don't want to.

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Teacher asks class a question, so I put my head down and pretend to take notes.

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I always leave a little coffee in the pot so that it becomes someone elses problem

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.