check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

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Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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Writing d as b and b as d or p as q

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sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.

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When I walk into the bathroom and the lid of toilet is closed, I always get slightly nervous to lift it up and see into the toilet. I'm always thinking there'll be something disgusting or scary in there.

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Make pictures on the bathtub wall using the clump of hair from the shower drain.

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Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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hug the pillow at night so it protects me from monsters

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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I eat spoons of dry hot chocolate powder when nobody is around.

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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Run up all stairs two at a time, and memorize all the staircases with odd number of steps. On those, I start with one step so I can end on a two.

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Check your analog watch, wait for it to strike a minute, then look away and try to count 60 seconds out in your head before you look again. However many seconds you were away is your new record.

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Give a 'thumbs up' or a 'thumbs down' based strictly on how much you like the number it will change it to.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

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Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

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Seeing someone gettin roasted for something and then making sure you dont do the same thing.

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My goal is to get as much as possible thumbs down at this post.

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I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.