I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

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Read through all these posts and get all excited when you see things that you thought only you did

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try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

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Thinking you could be in a "Truman Show" style scenario and scanning areas of your house and possessions for tiny little cameras and microphones.

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when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

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Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

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When someone is reading something out loud in class...and they are reading REALLY slow...You quietly read fast and you try to beat them to the end of the paragraph

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Imagine I'm being filmed in a reality TV show just so I could do something productive or interesting.

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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Whenever I walk through automatic doors I say "Thank You"

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When you think you don't hear someone, but as soon as you say, "what?" and they start repeating it, you realize that you know what they had said. But then you don't want to be rude, so you let them finish.

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When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

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I type things i really want to say to people and then delete them straight away because im too chicken to say it.

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when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

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I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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When you can't use your hand to push a door, kick it and say "THIS IS SPARTA!!!"

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every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

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Not wanting to think about something but your brain thinks about it because you are trying not to think about it so much.

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Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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Attempting to silently sneak a fart, then it erupts from your anus.

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This is kind of embarrassing... after I watched "Truman Show" I went home and talked to my mirror like Jim Carrey does in the film.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.