When doing your hair or makeup you pretend your doing a tutourial when nones around

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The longer it takes me to find the light switch in the dark the more frantic and terrified I become.

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As im about to fall asleep sometimes i feel like im falling and then i have a muscle spasem and wake up.

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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Cough and shift my feet a lot when someone comes into the public bathroom so they know someone is in the stall and won't walk in on me.

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Stay up late on the weekdays and go to bed early on the weekends ..... What is wrong with me?

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When I am driving, I hate everyone else who is driving.

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thinking your pants are wet when you only just sat down for a long time

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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Praying to God even though you tell people you're an Atheist.

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I can't help spitting into the toilet when I piss, let it drop out my mouth and hit the water to see if I can get it in the center.

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sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

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tell everyone that you think that mcdonalds is unhealthy and that you think there food is nasty but in reality you actually love it.

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skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

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Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

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accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

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I'll sing nice and loud in the shower and wonder why I haven't come out with an album yet

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Make little rectangles on your desktop when waiting for something to load...

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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I never read the terms and conditions but I say I have

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Press the Microwave open button at 0:01 to feel like you defused a bomb and avoided that stupid beeping.

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Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

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Think up a come back three days after it would have been useful.

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in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.