Sometimes...when no one is home, i talk and dance with my dog as if he was person :)

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Thinking about different guys and how they would be in bed, then thinking im a slut for thinking it...

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Use head & "Shoulders" for pubic hair

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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I always feel as if someone is always watching me on a screen where ever I am, and every person in the world is also being watched as well

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

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When in a room with a bunch of people, see the one person who's extremely cute and then get a random boner and think "GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY"

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when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

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When it's 12:59 or 4:59 or something:59, I don't let myself blink/breathe until it's 1:00 or 5:00 or something:00. Anyone?

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I have to fart real bad but people are around me , so I try to silent fart

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go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

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Tape your dick to your leg to fit into tight pants

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I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

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Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

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Go on Omegle video chat and worry that you'll see someone you know

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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I often wonder if people ever talk about me, when I'm away.

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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If there is a big spider in the house I will act cool and take it out even though inside I'm screaming

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losing something in the house, looking for it and then for some reason if I can't find it, I look in all the same places again

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as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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when i'm in the shower and i close my eyes, i thnk something's gonna be there to scare me when i open my eyes again.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.