I fake laugh at peoples jokes when they're not funny to avoid akward moments.

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Wonder if certain people can read my mind... start thinking weird stuff and try to stop.

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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think your hitting your leg on a chair or desk, really someones foot

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When walking down a long hallway with someone else at the end, becoming self conscious that your eyes are watering up

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Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

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Brake for tail-gaters

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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fall asleep in the shower.

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Thinking that you're the only person on Earth, and everyone else is there just to affect you.

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When riding in a vehicle at night, where the stars are visible, I feel like they're racing us.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

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Stepping on people's feet when I approach to kiss/hug/say hi to them.

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Sometimes I toot.

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Everytime my sibling starts a sentance with "I remember when","I have an idea"etc.,I get up and walk out.

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Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

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When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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When i play a video game and make some stupid noobish action including suiciding or playing in a lame way, i make sure that if somehow someone sees my screen, he/she notices why i do so.

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When a song comes on that i hate on the radio, i sing along with it because i know the lyrics. (Example: something by Justtin bieber D:)

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Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.