Courtesy flush.

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When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

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if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

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You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

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Reading a book and making the facial expressions it describes.

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Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

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Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

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Sometimes, I ask myself philosophical questions. The one that is bugging me now is "If reincarnation is real, why is this life so vivid?"

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I suck my shirt without realizing im doing it until people tell me.

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Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

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you spread your cheeks apart when you sit on the the tolet so that your poop does not touch your cheaks

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Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

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Sometimes I lie in bed and wonder what the house would look like upside down.

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Ask someone "what" when they tell you something even though you heard them clearly

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Sitting next to a banana called James

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when your walking past a chain link fence you slide your fingers along it because it feels cool

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clean specks of sh*t in the toilet by peeing on it.

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Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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Do math in ur head at night to help you fall asleep.

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

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I scold or point at my electronics and tell them "No, bad!" whenever I push the wrong button or shut them off on accident.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.