Sometimes...when no one is home, i talk and dance with my dog as if he was person :)

Thinking about different guys and how they would be in bed, then thinking im a slut for thinking it...

Use head & "Shoulders" for pubic hair

My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

I always feel as if someone is always watching me on a screen where ever I am, and every person in the world is also being watched as well

(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

When in a room with a bunch of people, see the one person who's extremely cute and then get a random boner and think "GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY"

when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

When it's 12:59 or 4:59 or something:59, I don't let myself blink/breathe until it's 1:00 or 5:00 or something:00. Anyone?

I have to fart real bad but people are around me , so I try to silent fart

go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

Tape your dick to your leg to fit into tight pants

I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

Go on Omegle video chat and worry that you'll see someone you know

I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

I often wonder if people ever talk about me, when I'm away.

Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

If there is a big spider in the house I will act cool and take it out even though inside I'm screaming

losing something in the house, looking for it and then for some reason if I can't find it, I look in all the same places again

as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

when i'm in the shower and i close my eyes, i thnk something's gonna be there to scare me when i open my eyes again.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.