Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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Pretend that i don't care about my birthday when i actually can't wait to see what present people will get me and get terribly excited everytime someone text me

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Look at adigital clock sideways when in bed while tryingto sleep and try to make the numbers look like faces

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

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the power to regenerate your appendix

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

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I'm in a hurry I press the elevator button several times

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

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poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

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See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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when i'm in a really good mood i think everybody is watching and admiring me

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

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Love to check my astrological compatibility with my favorite musicians.

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.