I think SpongeBob and Patrick are rude, inconsiderate a_holes. ... That's right, I'm an adult and I watch SpongeBob. lol

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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Walking down stairs. Accidently miss last step. Feel like you're going to die.

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you wonder if things look the same through other peoples eyes

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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incognito mode on google chrome

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A stranger makes me mad. Spend all day thinking about badass things that I should have done/said.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

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Put toilet paper on the seat in my own house.

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Drink a huge amount of water only for the pleasure of having your stomach filled with it.

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I look at my phone screen when i'm in an uncomfortable situation, and five minutes later i have to look again cause somebody asks what time it is.

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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Eat something that will make crumbs over the sink because you are too lazy to get a plate

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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I like to create stories and adventures in my head to make reality a little less boring...

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When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

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When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

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A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

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Check an insane amount of times to see if the door is locked, then finally get back to jerking off.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.