Sitting on a table at school and looking at the things u only think i do website

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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whale sperm

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Assume that on another planet or galaxy there are people just like humans that look exactly like me. Like an alternate universe.

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When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid something might try to kill me so I shower with my glasses on.

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Pretending you're in a tribute band when you listen to a song.

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At the peak of orgasm, i used to think that im making out with someone else (like my crush) to make me cum.

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When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

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When in a public bathroom stall and having to take a number 2 i wait until there is nobody else in there to let it go and also exit the stall.

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I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

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Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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when u see a blond, brown,black,or red head girl u think of a blond,brown,black or red head joke -Randi L.

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Scared to flush the tolite at friends houses in fear that i will wake someone up of break the tolite.

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When the car ride is silent, I wink with my right eye when I pass a sign on the right, and the opposite for the left. And then when there's a double yellow line, I close my eyes.

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Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

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Click my teeth from side to side at the beat of songs

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hearing the opening theme music to Disney or 20th Century Fox or whatever and knowing what it is before you see the screen, then wondering if you should feel proud or if your a weird geek.

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I have one friend I always punch in the shoulder at least once when I see him.

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Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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Whenever you are in a quiet room and are trying to eat a food that is very loud to chew (like chips) you try to chew slowly or alter your chewing style so noone will think your too loud

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I pee in the shower.

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really wonder why there is so much talk about pooping and farting on this site

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.