Turn on the faucet and/or fan when using the toilet at someone else's house or at my own place when there is a visitor because I don't want them to hear me peeing.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

thumb_up thumb_down +47

When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I post morals under every one of my new comments. Moral: Duh, I am moral man ffs! What do you expect! Its awesome! If things go at this phase I will be a celebrity in... hmm... in never!

thumb_up thumb_down -88

when someone goes underwater in a movie I like to hold my breath and see if I would have survived in that situation, I almost died during Finding Nemo

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

when i get pissed off at someone i go to an empty room and then imagine killing them

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Inspect the mirrors in store changing rooms in case they are one-way glass. Make faces into mirror as if you know they're back there.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

I get mad at characters on tv and i shoot the screen with my Nerf gun

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When I'm eating cereal, if some of the cereal gets stuck on the inside of the bowl above the rest I use the side of my spoon to push it down back into the milk.

thumb_up thumb_down +181

????????????????????C?????????

thumb_up thumb_down +5

When I'm riding in the car, I'll spot a tree, make it my goal and try to beat the car on the opposite side of the road to it. (Seriously I don't think anyone else does this!)

thumb_up thumb_down -44

When one of those sad sappy abused dogs commercials comes on, you change the channel really fast to prevent from crying.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

when im losing an argument, ill start singing my responses

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whenever I'm home alone, I dance and sing along to any commercial.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Do somthing only you do

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

thumb_up thumb_down -43

I think about other women when having sex

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

When I loose something , I buy a new one, then continue to find the old one the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.