When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

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Get to lazy to stand up in the shower so I sit down in the shower

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Smile like an idiot while reading this site.

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When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

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When ever my boyfriend doesn't reply to a text for a few hours I always imagine a worse case scenario and end up crying hystaricaly.

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Go up stairs two steps at a time. Avoid those stairs forever if there are an odd number and I have to end in a single step.

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I really don't know what to do when i see a double post on here. I mean, i get that people like to do stuff with their feet when their in bed, but somehow al lot of these people do not find it enough to vote up an existing post.

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I look for comments in this site that are on or close to 0 so that when i like or dislike them, i make a difference to the outcome :)

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Seriously I am tired but, I read the fucking solvemedia stating "forget this", then I stood there for a moment having just forgot what I was supposed to type. "Was I not supposed to forget what I just read?" Nero: BRAINWASHING! FORGET THIS AND LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER! IM LEUTANANT BANGUS YOUR MUTHERUS YOU IDIOT!

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Try to see nipples through body paint.

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Sometimes when im sitting in class i start thinking how i would save the whole classroom if someone was to come in with a gun and start shooting.

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I have autofocus in my eyes.

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Imagine that other people see colors different from me and if i had their brain i would see it like them

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pick your nose and eat it

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Mouth words to people wearing headphones to try and get them to take them off.

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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i see almost everything as a sign

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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I can't drink while I'm walking I have to stop.

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wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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ask my dog questions then realize, she can't talk...

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Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.