I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Try to use my "Brain Power" to pick up things when I am too lazy to get up and get them.

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It's hot but I still have on covers

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Sometimes when I'm all alone, I like to rub vasceline on myself and pretend I'm a slug.

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Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

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Look at my poo before I flush it.

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When talking to someone you sometimes start with the middle of a story through the end, complete with random details that seem totally unrelated to them, and THEN you remember to tell the beginning (which is the part that actually relates to what they were talking about).

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When someone is reading something out loud in class...and they are reading REALLY slow...You quietly read fast and you try to beat them to the end of the paragraph

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Pick scabs and eat them.. and when i start bleeding suck the blood up with my mouth...

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My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

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When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

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When the car runs over bumps in the road on the freeway, they sound like horses hooves, so I pretend my car's being pulled by invisible horses.

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Always cover yourself in the bathroom mirror at home because you have this strange feeling that people at school are all watching you through your mirror~pls tell me im not the only one who ever feels this~oh well

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When riding in a vehicle at night, where the stars are visible, I feel like they're racing us.

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When I'm on Facebook, I flip between someone's most recent profile picture and their first one, just to see how much they've changed.

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Think about awesome stuff that you could do (e.g beating up someone who steals your gf's purse or something) when listening to music

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fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

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Constantly check your post on here to see if other people give it a response.

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feel special if I don't get thumbs up on my posts

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Sometimes after a long, hard day or when something bad happens I just sit down and cry in the shower.

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eat the salt from the bottom of the pretzel bag

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When I'm in the shower i let the water run off my arms and fingers and pretend I'm a giant god of water sending torrents to the miniature people below.

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scripting the blackboard with your fingernails? no problem, but just the imagination of biting on an ice cream stick out of wood and then moving it through your teeth makes me go crazy!

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Pretending you're in a tribute band when you listen to a song.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.