Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

When listening to music via headphones in public, I become paranoid that I am bothering everyone around me as my breathing becomes louder without me realising.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

I plant my feet firmly when the subway approaches in case a random stranger tries to kill me by pushing me in front of the train.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

thumb_up thumb_down -29

If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Before i go to sleep, i imagine all the things i would like to happen in the future, and hoping it comes true or ill dream of it

thumb_up thumb_down -74

grab my cats tongue when he is licking my hand

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

thumb_up thumb_down -4

When I pee if there is already some toilet paper there I try to sink it with my pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

thumb_up thumb_down -107

When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

ask my dog questions then realize, she can't talk...

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Start to tell a story, but realize that nobody is bothering to listen to you.. So you slowly let your voice fade off

thumb_up thumb_down +50

When walking on an old looking bridge I try to get off quickly and before anyone else gets on there because all I can think about is it giving way and me falling to my death/being very wet

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Doing something really embarrassing in public and thinking "Doesn't matter, I'll never see these people again.".

thumb_up thumb_down +96

Wake up, unnaturally hungry, make meal fit for a king.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I'll sing nice and loud in the shower and wonder why I haven't come out with an album yet

thumb_up thumb_down +70

while talking about someone, immediately fear they are somehow listening

thumb_up thumb_down +320

When laying in bed I put the covers over my head and act like I'm in different places..caves..tent..etc..

thumb_up thumb_down -160

Slate the game you playing but always go back for more...ie FIFA, Cod!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -100

Turning on the TV for background noise when I'm on my computer.

thumb_up thumb_down +313

I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.