hold my shirt with my chin when i'm peeing.

thumb_up thumb_down +102

Pulling the same faces as the character you are reading currently is.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

When the car ride is silent, I wink with my right eye when I pass a sign on the right, and the opposite for the left. And then when there's a double yellow line, I close my eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

thumb_up thumb_down -71

Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Ur mum

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Get distracted during fap dreams and thinking of your mom and then going OMG GROSS OH GOD IM A PERV!!

thumb_up thumb_down

I think Frozen is an overrated film

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

thumb_up thumb_down -24

saying long strings of unconnected words in your head and wondering if you just said something that noone else ever has

thumb_up thumb_down +266

I imagine that there are lines coming out from things and I don't step on the lines (columns, buildings, walls, corners, etc.)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Looking at this naked with a cat on you're lap.

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

getting a random wedgie when everybody is looking at me

thumb_up thumb_down -103

I prefer to masturbate by putting a fleshlight under my stuffed-toy smurfette's dress and pretend to smurf her.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Tried to stuff yourself in the fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I have an irrational fear of sloths

thumb_up thumb_down +46

I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Sometimes when im in my bed and trying to fall asleep, i don´t want to open my eyes in case there is a murderer standing before my bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If I'd see a grizzly bear in the forest I'd probably try to run away even though every sane person says that that's exactly the thing you shouldn't do

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When i'm eating M&Ms, I save one of each color until the end so I can eat them all at once.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.