I brace myself and close my eyes when I send an email to my teachers or parents.

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Put things in the front of the dishwasher 1st cause im to lazy to pull the whole thing out to put anything in the back or the right place.

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when you can't think of anything to type you just type random letters. a;lsdfj;ldfkjsfasdfljf

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avoid using ketchup and mayo since they make everything taste like um... ketchup and mayo... which is kind of boring

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I always poke myself in the eye when I put on mascara, then have a wild hand spasm so it gets all over my face.

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I constantly try to turn something I say into my catch phrase.

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Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

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I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

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When you say bye to someone and keep walking in the same direction, and then its really awkward...

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try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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jack off

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When I'm riding in the car, I'll spot a tree, make it my goal and try to beat the car on the opposite side of the road to it. (Seriously I don't think anyone else does this!)

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Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

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Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

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I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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Going to the very last pages of "Things you think you only do" with the lowest ratings and realizing that they really are the only ones who do that stuff...

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Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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only read the short jokes on this website

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Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

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There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.