I really like the day I was born even though there is nothing special about it like Dec 25 or May 20 (Christmas or Independence day)

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Suppress a sneeze and then walk around unsatisfied.

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After texting someone, check your phone repeatedly to see if they responded

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I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

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I pass by closed doors quickly and at least as far away as the door seems like it can open, because I always feel like someone's going to burst out, hitting me in the face with the door.

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Get creeped out at seeing 11:34 at least once per day. The number even turns up everywhere in my life such as my jewelry store.

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At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

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get home from work and masturbate instantly

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Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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dont turn my fan up so high cause i think its going to fall and slice me to bits -jesse

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when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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I'm paranoid of EVERYTHING. When I enter a room, I inspect it for cameras. When I'm in the bathroom I cover all the cameras on my iPod, Phone, etc. When I do something I'm not supposed to do on the computer (such as download music for free), I cover the webcam to assure the government can't see me. I control my thoughts 24/7 at fear that someone will read my thoughts. I have a strict feeling the someone is always watching me. I fear subliminal advertisements also. To sum everything up you could just read the first part. I DONT TRUST ANYTHING OR ANYONE! I'm Not sure if anyone else is as paranoid as I am...

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While lying in the tub the water gets cold so u turn back on the hot water with ur feet bc u are too lazy to get up and turn it on with your hands

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before i go to sleep i must check the front door knob multiple times to make sure its locked

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When I am driving, I hate everyone else who is driving.

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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find a nice photograph of food from the web and post it on fb just to watch my retard friends make a big deal out of it.

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When im going from one room to the next, i try and get into the other room before the door to the last room closes. If i do, I've won.

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.