I hate people who shows-off their SLR Cameras. I mean, so you're a human now because of that?

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sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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When I see interactive ads on webpages ( "Shoot 5 iPhones And Get One Free!" type of windows ), I feel compelled to finish the task, even though I KNOW it's going to open a pop-up and waste 10 seconds of my life.

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When taking a shower, and standing in the opposite direction where the water is coming fromY

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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You pause while walking around your house when you're home alone because you think you heard a noise, but then realize it was just you walking.

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Wondering how you look to other people and adjusting your clothes and posture so you don't feel as unatractive as you think you are, but aren't.

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When on long car rides, I always look out the window and imagine a little man running alongside the car.

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Can't seem to manage not throwing rocks into sea/river

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get home from work and masturbate instantly

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I don't read the terms of service.

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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Fart when i'm alone RIGHT before someone walks in... try to talk over the smell...

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play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

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While driving out in the country area, I am secretly looking for Squatch

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Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

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Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

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Try to fly by jumping and then discover you can't

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Every time I open a door, I shout out "Alohamora!" and then I open it.

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When I was a little kid and something scared me (i.e. feel like being watched when I walked through the forest in the dark) I began to sing... and then I felt somehow protected. Weird, isn`t it?

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Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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Look up definitions of acronyms in text messages or Facebook that I feel I should know because I'm teenager.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.