Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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Create a little story/scenario in your head abbout someone you like or want to meet, while lying to go to sleep.

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I rape small children ;).

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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Any time I shop for used clothes, I always have to ask, “Did anybody die in this?” –Ikka

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

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Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

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Go for a 10 mile run.

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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even though you know you turned the light off, you have to go check before you can get to sleep

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Watch the same movies over and over

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

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Waking up at 4 am wondering where your pillow went.

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Stalk boyfriend's facebook, go to everything he's commented on, and comment too.

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Smile like an idiot while reading this site.

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arrange certain social situations with attractive girls just to make spank bank deposits.

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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Think a really Fu**ed up thought in your head, and then get mad at your brain for even coming up with it, and finally trying to think really nice thoughts to make up for it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.