Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

When the T.V switches to commercial sometimes I forget what I was watching Noel

After learning a new word, I hear it used and written EVERYWHERE for the next week.

See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

Sit on the loo and think about life because I can't be bothered to get up

Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

When I'm in a place with two different colored tiles, I only step on the colored ones and pretend the white ones are lava or off-limits.

Sometimes I read a whole page of text only to realize I didn't actually read any of it. Then I read it again. Sometimes this happens more than 3 times for one page.

smell your socks cause you like the smell of your own sweat

I take receipts out of the ATM's disposal slot in order to see how much money people that I've never met have in their accounts.

I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

When playing Sims, i spend more time building my house, than playing the game itself.

I get angry when people use question marks where they don't belong. QUESTION marks are for QUESTIONS. Not statements or opinions >:( "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion?" X FFFUU- "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion." ?

When i'm home alone with the dog i have a conversation with the dog, sometimes in my head & sometimes out loud, in the voice that i think the dog would have if it could speak. Then sometimes i realise that i haven't checked if anybody else is home !

Press the Microwave open button at 0:01 to feel like you defused a bomb and avoided that stupid beeping.

wear warm clothes on hot days -jesse

I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

When someone is reading something out loud in class...and they are reading REALLY slow...You quietly read fast and you try to beat them to the end of the paragraph

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.