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Clarksonisms
I AM DISAPPOINT
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Not wanting to think about something but your brain thinks about it because you are trying not to think about it so much.
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-55
Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.
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-30
Yell at game shows when the people are stupid
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-5
Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .
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-51
Looking up 'How to tell if your crush likes you' to get assurance that he/she loves you
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-38
Not sure if im holding on to fart or shit
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-3
When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.
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-36
I am a BIG TIME movie talker. I always ask questions that people obviously don’t know the answer to like, “Where is he going?” “I thought they were friends?” “Wait.. Is she mad?” “Is that guy the killer?” Although people seem to tolerate me, I do promise that it is completely on accident. I don’t even realize I do it. –Ikka.
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-14
I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.
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-18
When you can't be bothered to go to the toilet so you stay watching tv or going on your laptop while trying to hold it in.
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-62
When laying in bed I put the covers over my head and act like I'm in different places..caves..tent..etc..
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-164
Someone asks a question and you say "what?" and then answer them because you actually heard but didn't realize it.
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+1,517
Sitting down in the shower
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-64
I always twist my washcloth into a cone shape, so when I take my next shower it is dry and hardened. Then I pretend stab it into my stomach and say "MY LIFE FOR AIUR!" before getting it wet again.
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-7
when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi
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-124
when someone says something like 'it's too late' i always start singing 'to apologizeeeeee' even though i think people are annoyed of me always singing along to their sentences and changing the meaning, but i just cannot stop it
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+6
Look at my eyes really close in the mirror and turn the lights off, wait, and then back on just watch my pupils change size. PS: Really? No way - I could've sworn I was the only weirdo who did that!
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+787
You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.
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-13
when i realise for example that my shoes are stinking i get really paranoid and try to cover them under the table or something because i feel that everyone is thinking about it or is covering their nose or stuff
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-27
Laughing randomly because you remembered something that was funny earlier
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+1,396
Check the time on my cell phone, put it back in my pocket. Dammit, didn't see the time. Check it again.
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+728
When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.
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-50
Start to do homework online, end up on facebook :/
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-28
When Ive just intentionally committed some minor traffic offense (speeding, illegal U-turn) and suddenly worry a cop may have spotted me and act to myself in the car as if I was truly confused and have no idea what I did wrong, like moving my head around and saying, "Huh? Where's that house?"
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-61
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.