HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

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Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

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When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

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Seeing a cartoon character eat something makes me hungry for it even though it may not taste good in real life and I know that.

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interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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when someone is playing a song which i really like but don't know the name of it i either try to guess the name by the lyrics or i try to read the name from their iPod without them noticing and then immediately make a note on my mobile and saving it.

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That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

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I never let anything go over the toilet when It's open.

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Ur mum

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Suddenly thinking that this is all a dream, and having to pinch yourself to make sure it isn´t. Or is it?

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when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

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Eat something that will make crumbs over the sink because you are too lazy to get a plate

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Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

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I stand under my ceiling fan, looking up while spinning around to make it look still...

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imagine squeezing your bladder in your hand when your peeing.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.