Think that a movie is shorter after you watch it once or twice

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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On true/false sections of tests, I get paranoid if there are not the same amount of trues and falses.

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If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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Feel like you sing wonderfully when you are alone, but feel like you sing horribly in front of others.

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When leaving a poop smear under the water in the toilet that doesn't get flushed away, I put a few pieces of toilet paper on the water surface to conceal it.

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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I pass by closed doors quickly and at least as far away as the door seems like it can open, because I always feel like someone's going to burst out, hitting me in the face with the door.

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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I tuck all sides of the blanket under my body and feet then over my head and leave a fresh air hole so im in a cocoon of blanket.

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

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when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

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really wonder why there is so much talk about pooping and farting on this site

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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masturbate quietly in my room.

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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Sometimes I wonder who created words. For instance, who thought to call a fence a fence? It could have been called something completely random like bucxbuw, but it would seem normal to us and fence would seem like jibberish instead.

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Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

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Walking down the toy isle in the store, and feeling a little sad that you're not a kid anymore.

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.