this is a terrible website and i hate you

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After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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make south park refferences every day

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Get really annoyed when something interrupts your yawn... then try and force yourself to complete the yawn

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Totally piss myself off by thinking of future confrontations that probably won't happen.

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When I'm watching something or playing something and the character goes underwater, I hold my breath until the character reaches the surface. This is weird as hell, does anyone else do this?

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

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Forgetting the same word over and over again and having a spaz attack when you can't remember it for more than a couple of seconds.

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Talk to my cat.

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A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

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feel that the horsehead network captchas can read my mind. kind of scary.

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I flick through the channels on my TV really fast to try and make a complete sentence.

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When I climb into bed every night, I always say, "Bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed," while shifting until I am comfortablely settled.

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

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I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

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I'm in a hurry I press the elevator button several times

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Say a word over and over until it sounds weird

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Any time I break something, I always try to put it back so it looks completely normal. That way, the next person who picks it up will have it break right in their hands… Thus becoming their fault... -Ikka

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When I woke up this morning I was asleep.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.