i feel relived after i prick and see that hard-white thinggy that oozes outside my annoying acne.

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I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

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When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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When I'm listening to my ipod on a road trip I look out the window longingly and pretend to be in a music video

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Counting the lines on the street as they pass the edge of your cars window.

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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Sometimes I think that I'm a character in The Sims 3 and someone is controlling everything I do.

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Realize you are dreaming and try to wake yourself up.

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I rearrange books, movies, etc. in the correct alphabetical order in the fiction section of my public library, other people's houses, classrooms at school, etc. Sometimes this process takes a very long time.

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I trap my farts under the covers and sniff them all up or cup them in my hand and sniff real hard to get the smell.

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pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

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Think up a come back three days after it would have been useful.

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I mustn't step on the cracks in the pavement

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ur parents never pay attention to u but when they do they r yelling at u

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when i take a shit and smoke i dont throw the cigar in the wc so the smoke wont come to my nose

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pretend you died to see what your dog would do.

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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When leaving your basement, become increasingly conscious of how you are scared of something getting you. SPRINT UP STAIRS.

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Feels my beard with my tongue.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.