Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

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When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

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I put morals on posts to get a thumbs up. Moral: Posts with morals get thumbs up.

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I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

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Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

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Thinking about how fast you blink and how many times you have blinked. You then start blinking too much because you are thinling about yourself blinking, and you try to stop, but you can't stop thinking about it.

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Act like your on a cooking tv show when your cooking

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I stop the microwave at 1 second so that one someone else uses it it beeps

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'horse-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

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If I'm doing something that involves two ppl i race even if the other person doesn't know it and if i win i get a huge ass grin which is awkward sometimes

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Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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Run up the stairs like a gorilla because it's easier that way.

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I never read the terms and conditions but I say I have

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A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

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Go up stairs two steps at a time. Avoid those stairs forever if there are an odd number and I have to end in a single step.

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Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

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when I take a big dump I turn around to see how big it is

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I scrape the scum off my teeth with my fingernail and then I eat it.

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Turn on Fox News and wonder if I'm watching a bad comedy routine or news reporting.

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Lick my cell phone screen to clean it.

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Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.