I look at my phone screen when i'm in an uncomfortable situation, and five minutes later i have to look again cause somebody asks what time it is.

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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Eat something that will make crumbs over the sink because you are too lazy to get a plate

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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I like to create stories and adventures in my head to make reality a little less boring...

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When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

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When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

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A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

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Check an insane amount of times to see if the door is locked, then finally get back to jerking off.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

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when singing to music on my ipod, i sometimes pause the music to hear how loud I am singing.

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Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

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I scratch and sniff.

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i take words i just read or said and sing them to the tune of a song

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.

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When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

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Moving my bottom jaw around slightly makes me feel like I have dog-like ears and I'm moving them around.

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I eat spoons of dry hot chocolate powder when nobody is around.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.