look at bins as i walk past them

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fap

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I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

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Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

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Walk into a public bathroom and go to the urinal, but then stop and think theres some guy who will perv on you and then go in the cubicle.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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I can't piss with my shoes on.

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When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

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When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

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Play poly-rhythmic drum beats along with my turn signal on my car.

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Wearing cheap CZ rings to either stop guys hitting on me or pretend I'm engaged.

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Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

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Apologizing to things when I drop them and feeling stupid afterwards

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How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

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I hold my breath in elevators

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Read through all these posts and get all excited when you see things that you thought only you did

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Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

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Instead of scratching my balls with my hand I rub them vigorously on the bed

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when I get a really good idea, I write notes in excruciating detail, as I believe my brilliance will quickly disappear and I will have no idea what I was writing about ..

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.