Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Pick giant boogers and eat them.

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I sometimes feel the desire to grab something fragile and - not out of anger, just because it would be funny - hurl it across the room to watch it explode.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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when baking cookies I eat waaayyy too much of the dough, to the point that I don't even want any of the cookies when I am finished baking them.

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fart

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when i take a shit and smoke i dont throw the cigar in the wc so the smoke wont come to my nose

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When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

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repeat what you just said 2 seconds ago in a group conversation thinking no one heard you

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when no one is home I grab my sisters boobs she has big ones I mean it.

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Constantly looking up at a Facebook tab while on another tab to see if you have any notifications or messages.

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wipe your hands on your pants

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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Take out all the marshmallows in a bowl of Lucky Charms, eat the "cat food" (the dry cereal that looks like dry kitty food!), then put the marshmallows back in the milk and eat them!

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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whenever im doing sumthing im not suppose to i feel like everybody knows what im doing

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Fill up a glass, drink half, then fill it up again.

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Close you closet door whenever you are about to go to bed.

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When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

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Picking my nose.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.