imagine killing someone by accident and feeling really guilty about it.

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When eating chips I always look at each side before eating it to choose which side will taste better

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Take a side of bacon and jack off watching Babe.

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I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

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Whatever situation I am in, I always start to invent rhythms with everything i have around, e.g. my legs, voice, tables or sometimes even the ground.

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At the gym, I always try to do 5 pounds more than the previous person.

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Leave the television on in my room when I go to bed, so I have some light and I can't hear all the creepy sounds that houses make.

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After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

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Make a little song with tiny breaths out of your nose

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I constantly get itches. On awkward parts of my body. In public places. And it's torture.

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Sometimes i think i've been living a dream life, and one day im really gonna wake up in the middle of 9th grade math class and have to explain why i was sleeping on my desk and jerking off so much.

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Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

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bounce when your tip toeing.

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Whenever I slurp from a straw I do it a little bit at a time, slowly and steadily so people don't turn at me and give me an annoyed face.

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when being in the bathroom at night, avoid looking in the mirror

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i open the cuboard door tosee if theres anything to eat and if theres nothing there i close it and go to the fridge if theres nothing there i go back to the cuboard =)

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Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

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when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

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Singing alone in the car and then stopping, scared that there is an audio recorder in the car recording you singing.

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My brother (who is 2 years younger) and I have our own language, consisting of movie quotes and silly stuff we made up when we were little. We speak it with abandon when we're alone, and try as hard as we can to suppress it when we're with a friend. But sometimes some of it slips out, and the friend looks at us like he's the guy who isn't in on the joke; I always get the feeling he or she thinks the two of us are crazy. By the way, if you're the third person in company with two close siblings who are speaking their own secret language, don't ask them to explain or look at them like they're crazy. They're not nuts, and you won't understand, even if they try to explain. Just let it pass.

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I chew on anything plastic. I don't think there's a pen that I haven't chewed on or a plastic cap I haven't put in my mouth. It's a horrible habit but it feels so DAMN GOOD TO CHEW!

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Moving my bottom jaw around slightly makes me feel like I have dog-like ears and I'm moving them around.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.