Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

Run faster down hotel corridors.

I rub the ends of my hair because it feels awesome.

When you tell yourself that this is the last page you'll read and end up reading three more.

Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

I pee in the water of the toilet to make bubbles

everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

I have had a dream where my teeth fall out.

Have a dream that you can breath under water and wake up and be very disappointed

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

While watching a movie, I imagine that same movie in my mind only replacing the characters with different ones from other series or videogames that I like. It just seems to make the movie better.

Thinking that you're the only person on Earth, and everyone else is there just to affect you.

Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

When I'm getting shouted out i blur my eyes and think of something else :3

I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

Ladies ; wear the thin underwear with the really skinny jeans & pants , & save the thick underwear for the baggy jeans & sweatpants ..

When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.