R A P E Children

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laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

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I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

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I'm a female. Sometimes I pee in the shower just so that I can try to aim my pee at the drain. This way I can imagine what it's like to pee with a doodle.

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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When I hear a sound that I don't know what is, while I'm in an unfamiliar place, I wipe off and then touch as many surfaces as possible. It makes me think that if I'm taken by some scary person, my fingerprints will be easily found. I'm not sure why that would help in many cases, but it makes me feel better.

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when i'm in the shower and i close my eyes, i thnk something's gonna be there to scare me when i open my eyes again.

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Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

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In britain,everytime i see a magpie i got to do this silly ritual and salute and say good morning mr magpie (depending on wat time of day it is) and make sure 2 ppl see it at the same time or something bad will happen.then someone will tell me another one i should do and i add it on! Its never ending.

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Everytime I get in my car at night, I turn the light on and check behind the back seats to see if there's anyone waiting for me. Then lock the doors when all is safe.

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Reach past the first two or three slices of bread to get the better, fresher bread towards the middle.

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Had a dream within a dream, just like Inception. You woke up and it felt so real you were sure of it. Then a bit later you wake up again.

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Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

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Avoid as many television commercials as I can

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Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

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When I have headphones in, I wonder if my swallowing is extremely loud for everyone else too.

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play with a knife and pretend to be a master blade wielder

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In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

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Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

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Randomly agree for the Terms of Service for just about everything on the internet. Then becoming very frightened at the thought that you have violated them in some way.

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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While I am busy working I like to have music playing and while I type I type to the song and its beat

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When in bed, I fold a small section of the covers in my hand to make a point and poke my fingers with it.

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When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.