Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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if your listening to music, move the volume up and down to experience the bass a lil better

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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Check the time on my cell phone, put it back in my pocket. Dammit, didn't see the time. Check it again.

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When I let water out the bath I swish the water so it makes a little whirlpool

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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I sometimes feel like I am the only one like me in this world

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Going to the very last pages of "Things you think you only do" with the lowest ratings and realizing that they really are the only ones who do that stuff...

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I eat food when i'm bored..

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When a lot if people are yelling at me / disagreeing with me all at once, I start laughing.

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While listening to songs, your always thinking of a situation to go along with it.

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Lying in be and pretending you are in a tv show, the characters best friend, playing it out in your mind. Or you dream while awake, and you control it, and you fly to Hollywood and become your faborite celebrities best friend.

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Having a dream and forgetting it seconds later.

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Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

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whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

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get bored so I fist myself for money

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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Every time I see my self in a mirror, I feel like I'm watching someone in a different dimension and make quick movements to see if they mess up.

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I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

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I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

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Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

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See the person you like at school, have a quick random sexual thought about them, le random boner appears, and you flip out in your mind

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Always check the other side of the shower curtain when showering out of fear that someone is on the other side

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while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.