sometimes i close my eyes and i rub them to see psychedelic drawings

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Somehow can't find anything good to eat after going grocery shopping... even if you buy Oreos

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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When I walk from one room to the next, I make believe that the room I just left exploded, and that I made it out just in time.

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I don't leave the toilet in a public restroom until the other person leaves, so I don't have to make awkward eye contact.

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when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

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*Sees bug on wall while taking shower* *Splashes with shower water* *Bug slides down wall* >_

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I delete all notifications on my phone before i shut it off.

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Every once in a while I think 'I know you're reading my mind...' and look about the classroom. See if anyone looks at me.

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Eat something to pass the time while I wait for my food in the microwave to be cooked.

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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I pass by closed doors quickly and at least as far away as the door seems like it can open, because I always feel like someone's going to burst out, hitting me in the face with the door.

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I sometimes wonder what my past self would do differently if it knew what would be going on now

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

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When I was younger I started doing a weird habit of playing music and spinning around in circles in my room... .. I still do it to this day.

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Remember some homework I have to do... On the day that it's due.

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When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

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penis

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When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

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hurting your foot and running around trying not to think of the pain!

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If I'm home alone, I tell myself good night when I am getting cozy in bed. I even use my name.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.