Ur mum

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If its dark and you have to go with rhe stairs i do that running because i tink somebody is behind my

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Two minutes after I text the person I like, I check the message to see what time I sent it and what time the person received it, and estimate that it takes the adverage person about a minute to respond and then another minute for you to receive it. so really, if the person likes you, it would take them about 3 minutes to respond. if its five, you automatically assume they hate you.

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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Read through all these posts and get all excited when you see things that you thought only you did

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if something stands for something, i come up with my own version of it.

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when I get a really good idea, I write notes in excruciating detail, as I believe my brilliance will quickly disappear and I will have no idea what I was writing about ..

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Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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Try tosing in the same tone and impersonate a girl voice while listening to music in my room, but then quickly start humming in a low voice when someones walking by -Ethan

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Wondering where are famous people and what they are doing at this exact moment.

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Get the feeling that somebody is going to grab your foot when you walk by a bed in the dark...

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I always leave a little coffee in the pot so that it becomes someone elses problem

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I sometimes have bad dreams that for some reason I don't want to wake up from because I just want to see what happens next

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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I have seen a UFO

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.