When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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Look at the time but have to look again 3 seconds later because you forgot.

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When I have an argument with someone and they're correcting my grammar over a word that I obviously made up but they're grammar/slash spelling skills suck I want to end them.

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A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

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When writing out something in the air, you mess up so you "wipe" out the mistake and then move to another piece of air because it's "cleaner".

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Realize you are dreaming and try to wake yourself up.

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When ever a door is about to close I always try to put my hand between the door and stop it, but it gets to small and I get scared.

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not eating the ends of a hotdog.

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Seeing someone gettin roasted for something and then making sure you dont do the same thing.

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When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

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Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I flush the toilet if the water's green and I'm going to have a poo, so it doesn't splash me.

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Sometimes I kiss my hand and pretend it's a person I like.

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When I'm on an escalator going up, I always imagine myself falling back and how incredibly painful (and possibly bloody) it must be.

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Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

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Here's a fun game I play if I wake up in the middle of the night: I look over at the alarm clock and see what numbers are displayed. Then I shut my eyes tightly and wait a few seconds before opening them again. If I open my eyes and see that the numbers on the alarm clock have changed, I win. If I open my eyes and they didn't, I lose.

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

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When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other in the same way just to be fair to both hands

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I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.