All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

Fart at home

When i'm done sleeping, I wake up.

Try to pet your cat with your foot.

Having an OCD moment when the number of questions on a test is not a multiple of 5. I mean, who puts 47 questions on a test?! Or 53? English and Math teachers rarely do this but it's always the Histoy ones...

Whenever I read a book, in my head it all takes place at my own house, or some other familiar location.

Get random feelings of nausea and/or dizziness for no apparent reason.

do math problems in my head while having sex to keep from coming

Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

i cant fall asleep unless i suck my thumb...

Have a dream with horribly unfortunate events (like having an amputation or being in prison) waking up from said dream and saying something like, "Good thing that was a dream, don't know what I'd do if that was real"

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

Every time i get a new video game i read the back of the case and the pamphlet the whole ride home

sitting in the passenger seat of the car, move my head around gently to guide a piece of dirt on the window in the foreground around the obstacle course of trees, streetlights etc in the background. Also, imagine my eyes are projecting lasers which cut through anything and carve the passing world up to my design.

when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

I make all the faces on my money face the same way.

Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

Sleep with one leg on top of the covers and the rest of your body under them.

im going to kill that person and get away with it

suck my own penis

Whenever people dare accuse me of being too full off myself I tell them. Moral: I cant get to full of myself, the more me, the less you, ALL THE BETTER FOR EVERYONE! WE ARE VICTORY! (except you)

When I need to poop in a public toilet, I poop to the side so there's no plop.

If someone uses a term thats like, in the know, and they ask if i know what it means, ill act like, of course ido, even if i dont, and then ill go home and look it up.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.