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i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.
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-33
Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....
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-20
think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday
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-33
Every time I watch the movie I cry when the babysitter sings that song in the blues bar in the movie "Adventures In Babysitting"
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-3
I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.
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-6
when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions
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-41
I prefer to masturbate by putting a fleshlight under my stuffed-toy smurfette's dress and pretend to smurf her.
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-50
"Turn the tv volume with my feet" "Take a wood stick and think it's a sword"
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-40
At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.
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+20
Make up a song to yourself.
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-158
Find different ways to crack your knuckles when you're bored. (I have found 7 ways to crack a finger and I can crackj my hand back
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-6
Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly
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-28
Pretend it doesn't hurt when someone I try for rejects me, but it does hurt, a lot.
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-56
draw the sun at the corner of the page
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+3
use cleverbot to chat to automated dating chat bots. even if i don't understand swedish.
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+3
while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.
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-59
When I'm in a room with other people, no matter who they are, I make myself choose the person I would tolerate the best having sex with just in case of a disaster and we need to procreate.
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+22
Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.
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-23
I refuse to eat cherry starbursts because they taste like medicine.
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-2
sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people
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-21
Scared to flush the tolite at friends houses in fear that i will wake someone up of break the tolite.
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-35
I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.
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-11
Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.
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-37
from now on in gonna eat healthier! *seeing chocolate* hm... okay i'll make an exemption today but from TOMORROW on!!!
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-86
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.