Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Not clicking the Facebook 'like' button on "pee in the side of the toilet so its not as loud", because it will show up on your profile, and you think other people will think you're strange.

thumb_up thumb_down +700

Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Eat something that will make crumbs over the sink because you are too lazy to get a plate

thumb_up thumb_down +16

always want to tell my friends the nightmares I had but they don't sound as horrible as they actually were spoken out loud and then get annoyed if their no tike 'OH my god! And what happened next...?'

thumb_up thumb_down -24

i see almost everything as a sign

thumb_up thumb_down -63

looking at the bottom when i meet foreigners talking among themselves... dang. no subtitles.

thumb_up thumb_down -100

When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Sometimes I imagine what it would look like if I was seeing out of another person's eyes across from where I happen to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +910

Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down -108

Wipe drink can with shirt after someone (mainly father) has had a sip.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Stand really close to the mirror and look myself in the eyes. Try to scare myself or make a really fast movement, hoping my reflection can't keep up.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Waking up at 4 am wondering where your pillow went.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Go into a shop that you thought would have some interesting things, but when you find that it dosn't, you quickly browse the shop for a bit so that you don't offend the cashier by entering and leaving immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

When I'm eating ice cream in a bowl I stir it until it becomes like ice cream soup.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

thumb_up thumb_down -44

When I am walking and accidentally touch a strangers hand I pretend it never happened -Marquez, P

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.