Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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always get sports injuries, never get any attention from them

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worry about your eyebrows sneaking their way up and making wrinkles on your forehead

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Try to see nipples through body paint.

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When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

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laziness .... its all in the mind

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftcodes.info <

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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When I walk from one room to the next, I make believe that the room I just left exploded, and that I made it out just in time.

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When winking, I feel as if I have to wink with the other eye to be fair to both eyes.

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Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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you look at someone and they look toward you and you look away quickly then you look back to see if they are still looking.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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I type a comment here and secretly feel special

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Get scared while I'm doing things on the computer like writing these comments, or other weird stuff because I think there might be a hacker watching my screen.

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I control water in the shower.

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Purposely save one piece of homework untill Sunday night in case you want to get out of doing something boring.

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.