- Things You Think Only You Do

I scrape the scum off my teeth with my fingernail and then I eat it.

clean specks of sh*t in the toilet by peeing on it.

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

Whenever I switch sides on my bed, I feel like when I turn around some scary clown face is going to be RIGHT THERE in my face

Feel like you sing wonderfully when you are alone, but feel like you sing horribly in front of others.

Happy April 28th everyone! Today is the first day of the rest of your lives, a time for new beginnings to run wild, a time to put a final ending to the past mistakes and troubling thoughts that may have been clouding your mind for far too long until now... The time is here, The time is now, Today is the day, Right here, right now, Right this moment, This is the right time... This, IS THE TIME TO DECIDE... To take time to make time, and let time pass by while you try to decide on how you wanna live your life? Falling into the same patterns as time before, and as will be, time after time? OR, simply, you can choose to LIVE... letting yourself have the time of YOUR LIFE!!! =) The choice is yours, what will you decide??? <3

I let everyone know I'm a lesbian as soon as I meet them, ('cause I wouldn't want to continue talking to someone who hates gays).

I sometimes wonder what my past self would do differently if it knew what would be going on now

I masturbate with sandpaper

I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.

When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

When I am bored, I imagine saving my crush' s life and we live happily ever after. :( what an idiot I am

When serving grilled steak, I always make sure I get the best one.

I set my alarm clock early just so I can get up snooze it.... One, two, three, maybe even four times.

Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

Get distracted during fap dreams and thinking of your mom and then going OMG GROSS OH GOD IM A PERV!!

Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

Hate when you finish a cup of pudding or something like that and you don’t want to get up to put the spoon in the sink so you just leave it sitting in the cup but the spoon is too tall for the cup and it falls over.

Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

I have tons of imaginary conversations in my head with people I know, but they never happen. It's worse when something funny happens in the imaginary conversation and I laugh to myself, and if someone notices I can't even say that I was remembering something because I wasn't, it had never happened...

every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

before going to a party, i rehearse the conversations i expect to have with the people who will be there (even though those conversations never actually happent)

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.