I use my phone's auto-correct to make sure the words I'm writing are correct.

When home alone and you hear a noise getting out a gun/weapon.

I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

whale sperm

Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

I act as though I've had movie cameras placed in my eyes and a bunch of people will watch my life as a movie at some point. And so I do a narration voice for them.

Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

If I see a shriveled, dried leaf while walking along the sidewalk I am compelled to step on it and make it crunch.

I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

Instead of scratching my balls with my hand I rub them vigorously on the bed

Not buying a product you might have otherwise been interested in simply because you think their TV ad is stupid.

Cuss my ass off in the morning - jd

Popping your finger in your bellybutton, and then smelling it. You secretly like the cheesy smell.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.