The longer it takes me to find the light switch in the dark the more frantic and terrified I become.

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Act like your on a cooking tv show when your cooking

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Questioning why they make the Captcha's(spamblocker) SO hard to read

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When eating food leave back the food u like the most for last

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Reflection and deep thoughts about the origin of life and the universe when showering

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If I'm in my room and I need to fart, I walk into someone else's room and fart in there so that my room doesn't stink up.

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When riding in a vehicle at night, where the stars are visible, I feel like they're racing.

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When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

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FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAPFAP FAP ::TROLLFACE::

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Try to stop a stopwatch exactly on 1 second with no extra milliseconds

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I look at my phone screen when i'm in an uncomfortable situation, and five minutes later i have to look again cause somebody asks what time it is.

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When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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When I'm peeing in the urinal, I aim to the side so it doesn't deflect back on me.

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losing something in the house, looking for it and then for some reason if I can't find it, I look in all the same places again

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When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

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blink

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Think about Facebook chats when your offline!? P.S Am I the only one, REALLY!

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When I'm walking on the sidewalks, I make a game of how to walk on the pavement squares so I don't step on a line.

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Sometimes when my mom is aking me something and then i tell her the truth i start smirking automatically as if i'd be lying because i don't know how to make a serious face

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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from now on in gonna eat healthier! *seeing chocolate* hm... okay i'll make an exemption today but from TOMORROW on!!!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.