Feel like you sing wonderfully when you are alone, but feel like you sing horribly in front of others.

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whenever there's a fight on facebook, i sit back and read it and i'm just like "people are stupid hehe"

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Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

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Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

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I'm in computer class at school right now. I'm supposed to be making up for incomplete assignments. But I have been on Things only you think you do, Funny Exams, DIY Fail, Pointless Super powers, Explain this image, and Perfectly Time Photos all class class period. I just noticed these websites aren't blocked at school.

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Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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Meet a really cool girl imagine the rest of my life with her.

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When I see someones comment has alot of dislikes , I add on to it .

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put a load of loo roll in the loo before taking a dump at work so it silences the landing.

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If I'm home alone, I tell myself good night when I am getting cozy in bed. I even use my name.

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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Eat something that will make crumbs over the sink because you are too lazy to get a plate

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Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

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Think a really Fu**ed up thought in your head, and then get mad at your brain for even coming up with it, and finally trying to think really nice thoughts to make up for it.

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Whenever I go to a new place, I look around and carefully plan my escape route in case of zombies.

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bounce when your tip toeing.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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My brother (who is 2 years younger) and I have our own language, consisting of movie quotes and silly stuff we made up when we were little. We speak it with abandon when we're alone, and try as hard as we can to suppress it when we're with a friend. But sometimes some of it slips out, and the friend looks at us like he's the guy who isn't in on the joke; I always get the feeling he or she thinks the two of us are crazy. By the way, if you're the third person in company with two close siblings who are speaking their own secret language, don't ask them to explain or look at them like they're crazy. They're not nuts, and you won't understand, even if they try to explain. Just let it pass.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.