Stare blankly at your desktop when someone walks in the room so they won't know that you were watching porn lol

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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I avoid my wealthy but cool relatives because I don't want them to think I want money

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Zoning out while looking at something and then trying to find the spot you were looking at when you're out of the zone but you can't find it.

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Turning on the dryers in the bathroom so no one will hear you peeing

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Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

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When listening to music via headphones in public, I become paranoid that I am bothering everyone around me as my breathing becomes louder without me realising.

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when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

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Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

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Having to step on snails to hear the crunch

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I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

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When you accidentally mess up a password, delete the entire thing and redo it since you don't know which part you messed up.

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Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

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poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

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imagine squeezing your bladder in your hand when your peeing.

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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Turn the fan and/or sink on in the bathroom to drown out the noise from masturbating.

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I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

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Trying to take the same number of steps in a block of sidewalk while you're walking.

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Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.

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use the shower water running of my arms and hands to shoot off random hairs inside the shower

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close one eye or the other to move an object near by when I'm bored -Noel

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.