Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Pick scabs and eat them.. and when i start bleeding suck the blood up with my mouth...

thumb_up thumb_down -121

If there's a mirror i look if there's people around looking at me, and if there aren't it's ok to stare at my reflection.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

turn on my reading light when I get in bed just to check if there's a monster.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

You laugh to yourself when you think you are alone in a street but then you notice somebody in a car looking at you.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

Go through funny pictures and memes on Facebook, and then accidently miss one and ten when you click to go back you have to go through like 5 more to get back to the one you want.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

calling someone and it rings so long you forget who your calling and when they answer you have to look at your caller i.d to remember.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

When looking for something you need, just walk in circles around the house until it appears.

thumb_up thumb_down +127

I'm a female. Sometimes I pee in the shower just so that I can try to aim my pee at the drain. This way I can imagine what it's like to pee with a doodle.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Watching a movie with bugs in it and instantly feeling that shivery 'holy sh*t there are bugs on me' feeling.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

thumb_up thumb_down -49

sometimes playing on music on your iPod you think people will like even though you're wearing headphones and nobody can hear you

thumb_up thumb_down -91

Get that shiver when you're peeing.

thumb_up thumb_down +231

Look at the clock, then instantly forget what time it is and look again.

thumb_up thumb_down +288

Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Repeat the phrase "you too" after a comment someone makes that does not apply. Bob: happy birthday Jim Jim: you too bob. Awwww sh!t.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I constantly talk to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down +221

saying long strings of unconnected words in your head and wondering if you just said something that noone else ever has

thumb_up thumb_down +263

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.