Pee in a glass and pour it down the sink, if someone is using the bathroom already.

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I refuse to eat cherry starbursts because they taste like medicine.

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log off the internet then think of something and go back on

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Sometimes, after I say "bye" to a person on facebook, I wait a few seconds before I log off so that it seems like I said "bye" to other people too. Because I'm just that popular.

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Always look down at the floor or avoiding any kind of eye contact when your getting told off for something really bad

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You do a retarded dance when a song you don't like comes on

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When I'm sleeping, I turn and my bed shakes, and I wake up thinking it's an earthquake.

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Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

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Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

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Writing d as b and b as d or p as q

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stop the microwave when I hear the food popping

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Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

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Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

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Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

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When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

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I pee in the shower. :3

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When walking down a long hallway with someone else at the end, becoming self conscious that your eyes are watering up

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Imagine the perfect video game and wonder why nobody made it yet.

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While making yourself something to eat that takes more than 5 minuets to make. Pretending that you have your own show on a cooking station and talk like your talking to the audience the whole time.

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check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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log out of any social network sites so that when im on a website it doesnt somehow send messages to my profile

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Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.