I put morals on posts to get a thumbs up. Moral: Posts with morals get thumbs up.

Breathe.

when i know that friends are coming to my place the next day i clean up my room and then i'm like...oh i forgot to clean up i'm sorry, it's always in a mess...

i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

sometime i poop in my hand, then put it in the toilet so it makes less noise and the water doesn't splash up my butt.

On Youtube. Moving the mouse cursor over the video thumbnails thinking it will display different snap shots from the video. And realizing what a guy I am...

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

I use chopsticks or disposable latex gloves to eat sandwiches, chocolate, basically any finger food, because in my opinion, it's impossible to get that greasy, sticky film off my fingers.

I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

Look at the clock to realize that it seems like the "second" hand is taking longer on the number its on right when you look at it, and/or you looked at the clock at the absolute perfect time. And it happens frequently..

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

when i meet ppl i often think of them as if two other ppl i know had a baby even if they are the same sex.

Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

Have to suddenly poop while shopping (mainly in Wal-Mart), but don't feel like traveling far to the restroom. So I kneel down in whatever aisle I'm in, casually shove my heel up my butt, and pick up some random item from the shelf and pretend to be interested in it. Finally, when the poop is secure in my butt, I'll put the item back and continue my shopping.

Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

When they say the name of the movie in the movie i get excited o.O

when I go shopping I go in the store, get what I need and then I leave I don't browse.

Playing TV in bed because if I don't I jump at every noise in the house and don't sleep.

While reading these posts on here, I find that I do a lot of weird things that I've never really thought about.

When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.