Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

When I am doing something that involves using one hand I feel weird because I don't know what to do with my other hand

I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

I choose not to post a comment on some subjects because I know there will be a hundred others that will be the same.

Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

I used to eat bath bubbles

Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftcodes.info <

the power to regenerate your appendix

Clenching your teeth subconsciously, then wondering why your teeth hurt so much afterwards.

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

When Im going to sleep , I try to think of good things so I wont think of scary things

Feeling sorry for objects to throw away!! Haha anyone els?

masturbate quietly in my room.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.