hearing the opening theme music to Disney or 20th Century Fox or whatever and knowing what it is before you see the screen, then wondering if you should feel proud or if your a weird geek.

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Lick my cell phone screen to clean it.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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RAPE CHILDREN

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When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

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Imagining a friend can see everything you do during the day through telepathy.

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Go up/down the stairs in 10 steps exactly. Talk to an imaginary girlfriend when I'm guilty of something, and she helps me out and holds me till I fall asleep.

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Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

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Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

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When I go to use my laptop if my cat is sleeping in my chair I would use it somewhere else and leave her alone.

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I violate and then kill people, all ages and kinds... ..:But everyone does that right? I mean... Lol, I just type that because I am insecure now, and I kill when I am insecure... ...Excuse me.

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I have tons of imaginary conversations in my head with people I know, but they never happen. It's worse when something funny happens in the imaginary conversation and I laugh to myself, and if someone notices I can't even say that I was remembering something because I wasn't, it had never happened...

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when singing to music on my ipod, i sometimes pause the music to hear how loud I am singing.

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when i meet ppl i often think of them as if two other ppl i know had a baby even if they are the same sex.

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Turning on the TV for background noise when I'm on my computer.

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When I am bored, usually in class, I simulate what I would do if the zombie apocalypse was occurring right now.

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I poop on the side of my house in the morning so I do not have to make noise then come back in.

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I put salt on buttered toast...

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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When riding in a vehicle at night, where the stars are visible, I feel like they're racing us.

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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When I'm waiting for someone who is late. I go-over in my head how I'm going to greet them. For example "Well, it's about damn time", or "Finally!".

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When riding in a vehicle at night, where the stars are visible, I feel like they're racing.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.