Pretend animals talk to you!

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

suck my own penis

I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

avoid going in the handicap bathroom stall because you're afraid someone will see you cause it's so big

blink

When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

Get exstremly sad or depressed whenever you think about something you did that was embarrassing or something you regret infront of someone when that person probably doesn't even remember it....

Putting your bra on your dogs dead

You keep going through pages of "Things You Think Only You Do" clicking the button until you realize that your on like page 50.

Kill Jb without getting aressted.

When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

When I have a bottle in my hand and nothing to do in class. I read the nutrition facts and ingredients 2 to 4 times until the teacher says something.

For some reason I really love to be hated on horsehead network, no idea why, stopped questioning it moments ago... Moral: Know what I mean?

i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

Tap different rythyms with my fingers and keep doing it over and over until the rythym ends on the last finger

hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

When I go to use my laptop if my cat is sleeping in my chair I would use it somewhere else and leave her alone.

Say a word I just learned over and over again until it loses meaning.

Constantly refreshing the Captcha for fear that It'll be wrong and I have to redo everything I did.

Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.