Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

When I have a really good dream, and I wake up and realize it was a dream, I try to fall back asleep and re-visit the dream.

think about what im gonna say abillon times in my head before i say it -jesse

Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

Eating a crunchy food while watching tv and turning up the volume little by little until its around 80% because you can't hear over the sound of your own chewing. Then later when you turn back on the tv you scare yourself because it's still at 80% and frantically try to turn it down with super speed before anyone hears you.

Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

Try having a conversation with your friends parents but keep saying yeah the whole time

realize you are saying your thoughts outloud.

On YouTube , I try to find the clearest music

wonder if there are secret cameras watching my every move...

When realizing i'm being a little bitchy, I laugh and smile right after my sentence to make myself seem a little nicer.

I pretend that my actions are perceived by a past self and they're always astounded by the change I've gone through.

I peel tiny strings off of cheese sticks because it's more fun and tastes better.

Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

When leaving a poop smear under the water in the toilet that doesn't get flushed away, I put a few pieces of toilet paper on the water surface to conceal it.

Constantly refreshing the Captcha for fear that It'll be wrong and I have to redo everything I did.

Think that a movie is shorter after you watch it once or twice

Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

When I forget to brush my teeth, scrape off the plaque on my teeth with my fingernail.

DAS RITE MODERFOCKER! NOWUN MESSIS WIF FIRLUPE!!' (throws wine in face)

I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.