Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

When riding in a car I pump my arms to pretend I'm running at an incredible rate.

Before getting in the shower, staring at your naked body, thinking your sexy.

choose which piece of cereal in the cereal bowl i should eat last.

Not being able to balance in heels because the insides are smothered in foot sweat. -_-

wonder if there are secret cameras watching my every move...

Think of a bunch of "things you think only you do" after you leave the site

When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

When i'm done sleeping, I wake up.

Put my hand under the pillow in bed to get orgasm

when your walking past a chain link fence you slide your fingers along it because it feels cool

I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

I piss excellence, shit suppority and whip myself with greatness.

If someone uses a term thats like, in the know, and they ask if i know what it means, ill act like, of course ido, even if i dont, and then ill go home and look it up.

I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

Not expecting anyone to come over, some one knocks on the front door, mute the TV and hope they just go away.

when im in a public toilet and my freinds outside i make loud converstation with them so they cant hear me pee.

When on a sidewalk I always try to make my last step on the block with my left foot.

I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

Apologizing to things when I drop them and feeling stupid afterwards

stand in front of a mirror with your headphones in, and lip sync the words of the song playing to pretend you are singing in a music video

When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.