Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

right before I go to sleep, I think about a certain situation. so I will dream about that

When taking a pee instead of standing in front of the toilet stand in the side so if someone walks in they wont see your penis

Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

pissing really fast to remove shit stains in the toilet

If no one else is home and you have to go to the bathroom, but you're invested in what you're doing on your laptop, you take it with you.

Seperate your food on you dinner plate

sometimes playing on music on your iPod you think people will like even though you're wearing headphones and nobody can hear you

I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

wonder if there are secret cameras watching my every move...

Listen to music while browsing the internet, having facebook open in another tab, and randomly you hear facebook message sounds, even though they aren't really there.

When your best friend has a certain make/model/color car, you start seeing it everywhere you go.

sleep with your legs crossed like your meditating.

Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

See a persons name a place a word or thing in a book computer magazine etc... and right after hearing the same thing on tv or the radio. Vice versa

Have deja vu while talking to someone and then stop listening to what they are saying for a few seconds till the feeling passes, then nod like you have been listening the whole time.

I think about doing evil things to people then i tell the person about it nikki

I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.