When someone is talking to me and I'm not really listening, when it gets quiet I say 'that's crazy' so they think I'm listening.

Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

I rehearse arguments in my head.

When you Sitting on the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

Tape your dick to your leg to fit into tight pants

Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

I take pains to be Anti-Democrat and Anti-Republican. Because both parties are really gross money & career machines beholden to industry. I really am middle-of-the-road on lots of issues. even though I don't understand what the fuck makes an intelligent conservative tick. but I may just be biased because it's all neo-cons on the news. idk.

Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

Whenever I cross the road with someone I try to walk faster then them just in case a car comes it won't drive me over.

Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

Playing with a tiny piece of loose skin in the middle of my upper lip.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.