Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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right before I go to sleep, I think about a certain situation. so I will dream about that

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When taking a pee instead of standing in front of the toilet stand in the side so if someone walks in they wont see your penis

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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pissing really fast to remove shit stains in the toilet

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If no one else is home and you have to go to the bathroom, but you're invested in what you're doing on your laptop, you take it with you.

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Seperate your food on you dinner plate

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sometimes playing on music on your iPod you think people will like even though you're wearing headphones and nobody can hear you

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I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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wonder if there are secret cameras watching my every move...

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Listen to music while browsing the internet, having facebook open in another tab, and randomly you hear facebook message sounds, even though they aren't really there.

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When your best friend has a certain make/model/color car, you start seeing it everywhere you go.

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sleep with your legs crossed like your meditating.

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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See a persons name a place a word or thing in a book computer magazine etc... and right after hearing the same thing on tv or the radio. Vice versa

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Have deja vu while talking to someone and then stop listening to what they are saying for a few seconds till the feeling passes, then nod like you have been listening the whole time.

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I think about doing evil things to people then i tell the person about it nikki

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I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

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I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.