Reading a book and making the facial expressions it describes.

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you spread your cheeks apart when you sit on the the tolet so that your poop does not touch your cheaks

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Sometimes I lie in bed and wonder what the house would look like upside down.

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Think you're breathing way too loud when your headphones are turned up

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I wet toilet paper before I use it to wipe.

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Sitting next to a banana called James

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smell your socks cause you like the smell of your own sweat

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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When I'm waiting for someone who is late. I go-over in my head how I'm going to greet them. For example "Well, it's about damn time", or "Finally!".

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When an awkward situation arises, pull out my phone and aimlessly flip through the apps to pretend I'm busy doing something

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I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

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I'm really picky about how I earn money

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When i was little i used to see people's cars shaking and wondered why they were listening to a song that just goes "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

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When does eating pop corn, take apart the bag and lick all the extra butter.

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I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.

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when baking cookies I eat waaayyy too much of the dough, to the point that I don't even want any of the cookies when I am finished baking them.

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fart

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Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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Close you closet door whenever you are about to go to bed.

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When I drop something, I stand there and watch it fall, I stand still because I'm afraid that I'll maybe mess up something else, instead of picking it up quickly. Am I the only one? ;)

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check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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Think that when you're reading something or watching tv some people somewhere are knowing what your watching or whether or not you understand what you just read so you don't wanna reread it to risk looking stupid.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.