I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

when no one is home I grab my sisters boobs she has big ones I mean it.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

thumb_up thumb_down -27

When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I always walk down the hall James Bond style. Gun out, along the wall, looking around corners before I walk into or by a room.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -82

When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

thumb_up thumb_down -43

When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

thumb_up thumb_down -73

i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

thumb_up thumb_down -68

I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Checking your phone for a text when you know you don't have one. Matt

thumb_up thumb_down -45

If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

whenever im doing sumthing im not suppose to i feel like everybody knows what im doing

thumb_up thumb_down +241

When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Fill up a glass, drink half, then fill it up again.

thumb_up thumb_down +358

Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

thumb_up thumb_down -47

I really don't know what to do when i see a double post on here. I mean, i get that people like to do stuff with their feet when their in bed, but somehow al lot of these people do not find it enough to vote up an existing post.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.