Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

thumb_up thumb_down -46

I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

when something is lost you check the spot they or it should be at least 5 to 10 times

thumb_up thumb_down +108

put a load of loo roll in the loo before taking a dump at work so it silences the landing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

thumb_up thumb_down -79

Put your feet up on the wall when you can't get to sleep

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When taking trash up to the street, I always runback as fast as I can, counting down from 5, pretending there's a sniper about to shoot me.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Make scary faces in the mirror and try to scare myself

thumb_up thumb_down +37

When I walk into the bathroom and the lid of toilet is closed, I always get slightly nervous to lift it up and see into the toilet. I'm always thinking there'll be something disgusting or scary in there.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -29

when no one is home I grab my sisters boobs she has big ones I mean it.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -37

When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

When i'm in a classroom I think about all of the possible ways to save everyone if something bad happens.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When I'm alone I occasionally like to give a little hump to the air. Not for sexual reasons or anything, just because it feels right.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

In school trying to do a small fart because it really hurting and suddnly a earthquake happens

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.