Your mom. Just kidding everyone does her.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

I really like taking shits.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Looking around in disgust at your messy room and then doing nothing about it.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I pee in the shower.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Sometimes I wonder if the blue/green/red etc. I see is the same blue/green/red etc. you see

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I like to eat grilled cheese with ketchup

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Pick your dead skin then eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -108

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I always try to play it cool and act like it’s no big deal. But I always have a mini anxiety attack before actually stepping onto a moving escalator. It is a task trying to time my step perfectly where my foot isn’t hanging off a step and I have to hurry my second foot on there isn’t an awdward space of steps between my feet. -Ikka

thumb_up thumb_down -24

When I walk from one room to the next, I make believe that the room I just left exploded, and that I made it out just in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

If I'm doing something that involves two ppl i race even if the other person doesn't know it and if i win i get a huge ass grin which is awkward sometimes

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Someone waves at me and I wave back...and then I realize they were waving at someone behind me.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,413

I talk to myself while playing games so I don't feel lonley!

thumb_up thumb_down -110

Inspect the mirrors in store changing rooms in case they are one-way glass. Make faces into mirror as if you know they're back there.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

At the gym, I always try to do 5 pounds more than the previous person.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Masturbate while waiting for a game to load.

thumb_up thumb_down -106

Squeezing my cat's face back so it looks Chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

When on a sidewalk I always try to make my last step on the block with my left foot.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If I'm in my room and I need to fart, I walk into someone else's room and fart in there so that my room doesn't stink up.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.