This is kind of embarrassing... after I watched "Truman Show" I went home and talked to my mirror like Jim Carrey does in the film.

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wonder if famous singers are actually the one that sings the song, or if someone else records it in the studio and then they lip sync at concerts.

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did you notice if you travel: when your going to the place feels like 10 hours but when going home feels like 4 hours

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I can't help but wonder why people write things on web sites and don't bother checking their spelling. Now they look like an idiot no matter how funny or interesting it might have been.

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See someone thats so hot all you can think about is seeing them naked all day.

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coughing when your having a poo so people know that your on the loo

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You imagine your future self visiting you and tell you about your life.

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get embarrassed when someone is in the public bathroom, and your shit makes a splash in the toilet

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Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

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I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

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Sometimes...when no one is home, i talk and dance with my dog as if he was person :)

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Thinking about different guys and how they would be in bed, then thinking im a slut for thinking it...

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

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When it's 12:59 or 4:59 or something:59, I don't let myself blink/breathe until it's 1:00 or 5:00 or something:00. Anyone?

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I have to fart real bad but people are around me , so I try to silent fart

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go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

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Tape your dick to your leg to fit into tight pants

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I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

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Go on Omegle video chat and worry that you'll see someone you know

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.