make food scream if i chop them up.

I have seen a UFO

Pee in the shower.

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

I have never disliked any video on YouTube with not many views ( no matter how bad it is ) because I feel bad for the uploader.

eat curry and don't complain about its spiciness ...if you're not white

Find something on this site that you actually do not do, and think how weird the person who wrote that must be.

touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

Hate Skydoesminecraft.

When making toast, I stop the toaster halfway and flip the toast like it's sunbathing.

pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

Know you have enough milk in your cereal when you start to see it peek through the cracks

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

Sometimes when im sitting in class i start thinking how i would save the whole classroom if someone was to come in with a gun and start shooting.

Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

fap

Sit there with my hand just resting down my pants casually when I'm alone. It's comfy!

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

Look at my poo before I flush it.

When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.