Walk out of movie thinking that I would be like them some day.

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I plant my feet firmly when the subway approaches in case a random stranger tries to kill me by pushing me in front of the train.

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Seriously I am tired but, I read the fucking solvemedia stating "forget this", then I stood there for a moment having just forgot what I was supposed to type. "Was I not supposed to forget what I just read?" Nero: BRAINWASHING! FORGET THIS AND LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER! IM LEUTANANT BANGUS YOUR MUTHERUS YOU IDIOT!

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sometimes i wonder how it would be to think in another language and i try but cant

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This song will not come out of my head!

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Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

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When walking in a pub or a mall or any place which has music playing, I walk along with the beats thinking that I will look super cool doing that!

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When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

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When I'm on Facebook, I flip between someone's most recent profile picture and their first one, just to see how much they've changed.

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Can't seem to manage not throwing rocks into sea/river

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I only used to eat McCoys Salt & Vinegar crisps when it was raining, because I thought they tasted better when it rains. Anyone else?

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When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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Putting your bra on your dogs dead

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Shudder when someone bites down on icey poll or an ice cube

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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When I die during an online game I try to cram as much food and drink in my mouth as I can before I respawn. If I have no food I roll all over the bed.

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Buy something and try to save it for an event of some kind and end up failing to do so, every darn time too.

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When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

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I like wet humping better than f*cking. but sometimes it slips in anyway, and it's that's pretty enjoyable too. and mt girlfriend is cool with. ... so it's actualy pretty whatevs either way. but wet humping is my jam.

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Sometimes i think i've been living a dream life, and one day im really gonna wake up in the middle of 9th grade math class and have to explain why i was sleeping on my desk and jerking off so much.

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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sing in the shower

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Being so socially awkward that when you have a successful interaction with another human being, you play it in your head over and over again.

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When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.