Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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Pee in the shower

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eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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log off the internet then think of something and go back on

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Wonder why every single kid is looking at you in a restaurant.

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Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

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dont wash hands for the recommended 30 seconds

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Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

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I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

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look around my house for something to do for what feels like an hour then look back at a clock to realize thats its only been 4 minutes

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Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

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I can't drink while I'm walking I have to stop.

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When I'm in a car and I hear a song on the radio, I always imagine myself performing it perfectly in front of a crowd even though I know I'd never be able to do that. I've done this since I was very young and still do.

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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Yell at game shows when the people are stupid

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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tell everyone that you think that mcdonalds is unhealthy and that you think there food is nasty but in reality you actually love it.

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When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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Before I go to sleep, I imagine what it would be like dating a really hot actor or singer and think of dramatic scenarios that could happen.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.