If I see a shriveled, dried leaf while walking along the sidewalk I am compelled to step on it and make it crunch.

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you wonder if things look the same through other peoples eyes

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"????????? ???? ?????! ??? ?? ???????? UH1 HUEY!!! ??? ?? ???????? ??????? ??????????? ?????, ????????? ?? ??????? ? ??????????????? ???????!!! ?????? ????, ???????????????? ?? ???????, ?? ?????? ??????? ?? ????! ???? ???????????? ???????, ????? ??????? ???? ??? ?????????, ? ??????????? ?????, ??? ????????? ??????? ??????????? ?????!!! ? ??? ?? ????? ???? ??????? ??????????? ??????????. ???????? ????????,???? ????, ??? ??????? ?????? ??? ????? ??? ????? ???? ? ??????. "

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Have a fantasy where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart while Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum.

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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Drink a huge amount of water only for the pleasure of having your stomach filled with it.

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Imagine that other people see colors different from me and if i had their brain i would see it like them

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Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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I think I have superpowers and sometimes I try to use them by force, like lifting a pencil with my mind or elevate from the ground.

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Putting your bra on your dogs dead

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not eating the ends of a hotdog.

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Open Fridge, look around for few seconds, say to self - 'What the f*** am I doing?'

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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Tap different rythyms with my fingers and keep doing it over and over until the rythym ends on the last finger

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Start browsing a list of pics at the back, so I can see the order they were posted.

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when you dont know what someone said so you just awkwardly start laughing and it turns out not to be funny.

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sometimes i close my eyes and i rub them to see psychedelic drawings

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I always think I have special powers

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Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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Stalk people on facebook, find out something interesting, and later claim that it 'came up on your newsfeed'.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.