Whenever I am in a conversation with someone, be it a family member, close friend, or stranger, I nearly always imagine either starting a random brawl with them for no reason (i.e. punching them in the face) or making out with them or something, neither of which I would ever consider doing. Am I alone?

When I get the chance, I always nick a chip from my mum's or dad's dinner.

When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

I lie in bed and when I get bored I try to convince myself that I'm lying at the other end

Dance in the car just so the person you like will see you and be like "Aw, cute" but then they don't even see you so you stop...

Pretend to be texting to look popular in public

you forget your phone when going to the bathroom, so you search for a shampoo bottle or anything to read or play with in reach.

When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

turn off the alarm clock one minute before its goes off when you wake up in the morning

I make weird crazy faces at myself in the mirror whenever I leave the bathroom.

imagine killing someone by accident and feeling really guilty about it.

CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

I check behind the the shower curtin before I use the bathroom at night.

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

Somehow can't find anything good to eat after going grocery shopping... even if you buy Oreos

Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

When you are doing something (kind of weird) when you're alone and then stop because there might be a ghost watching.

After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

I try to accomplish things while waiting for the timer on the microwave can go off.

Watching tv with family/friends and laughing at something on the show, and then feeling awkward because no one else laughed.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.