check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

thumb_up thumb_down -35

i have conversations in my head about showing someone some music and end up playing specific parts of various songs on my ipod and memorise the timings just in case it does happen

thumb_up thumb_down -34

imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

thumb_up thumb_down -78

When eating food leave back the food u like the most for last

thumb_up thumb_down -99

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Burp, and then automatically say burp afterwards.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

When im in a public toilet, i try not to make any sounds when taking a crap, not even a fart, so that when i come out no one will think i was taking a crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I dip my pizza crust in soda

thumb_up thumb_down +133

Brake for tail-gaters

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Someone waves at me and I wave back...and then I realize they were waving at someone behind me.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,412

Whenever I read creepy pastas and there is a picture after the story I get afraid to look at it than when I do I freak out thinking it's going to eat me. Than when I look at it I shout FUUUUUUU.. Than look at it some more and I burst out laughing seeing its a fucking dumb picture.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

I use my phone's auto-correct to make sure the words I'm writing are correct.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When i'm home alone with the dog i have a conversation with the dog, sometimes in my head & sometimes out loud, in the voice that i think the dog would have if it could speak. Then sometimes i realise that i haven't checked if anybody else is home !

thumb_up thumb_down -15

never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

thumb_up thumb_down -10

When i want to write a joke on anti jokes.com i laugh at my friends instead!

thumb_up thumb_down -77

When someone is reading something I have to read it at sonic speed in my head before they get to the end and if i dont do it in time I get angry.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Try to stop a stopwatch exactly on 1 second with no extra milliseconds

thumb_up thumb_down -8

watch old shows I used to watch when I was younger

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I've had a problem all my life with people thinking I'm a boy, (I'm a girl) so when I first meet someone, my instinct is to find some reason, (however stupid) to say that I'm a girl, (EX: "Can you believe that people actually think I'm a boy?" like when I just meet them).

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.