- Things You Think Only You Do

Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

going to bed at 10:30 pm realize i have to check Facebook go to YouTube randomly watch 2 hours of nothing, then find my self pulling an all nighter cause its 4 am and i got school.

Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

Looking outside the window and imagining a huge explosion destroy everything and then u surviving and trying to find a way to survive

I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

Pull the curtain right to the end so there are no gaps just in case some weirdo at night decides to look in my window.

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

When the T.V switches to commercial sometimes I forget what I was watching Noel

After learning a new word, I hear it used and written EVERYWHERE for the next week.

See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

Sit on the loo and think about life because I can't be bothered to get up

Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

When I'm in a place with two different colored tiles, I only step on the colored ones and pretend the white ones are lava or off-limits.

smell your socks cause you like the smell of your own sweat

I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

When playing Sims, i spend more time building my house, than playing the game itself.

I get angry when people use question marks where they don't belong. QUESTION marks are for QUESTIONS. Not statements or opinions >:( "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion?" X FFFUU- "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion." ?

When i'm home alone with the dog i have a conversation with the dog, sometimes in my head & sometimes out loud, in the voice that i think the dog would have if it could speak. Then sometimes i realise that i haven't checked if anybody else is home !

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.