I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

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Go on Omegle video chat and worry that you'll see someone you know

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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I often wonder if people ever talk about me, when I'm away.

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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If there is a big spider in the house I will act cool and take it out even though inside I'm screaming

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when i'm in the shower and i close my eyes, i thnk something's gonna be there to scare me when i open my eyes again.

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

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If a donkey and a angle fish where to pro create what would be the out come? They can't mate a donkeys a mammal and a angle fish is a fish

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I sometimes feel someone is watching me and speak towards it in a calming tone, only to again speak to myself telling myself im just being silly... only to turn my head and look behind me just in case.

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Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

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watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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While walking past someone thats wearing sunglasses you stare at them and wonder if there staring a t you aswell

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Mayada stupid

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Clicking the thumbs up or down when two of the submissions have the same number of thumbs up and think i'm the chosen one.

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I combine every item on my plate in all the possible ways, then i eat the worst part of the meal and save the best part til last.

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Buy something and try to save it for an event of some kind and end up failing to do so, every darn time too.

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I dont know weather or not to flush the toilet at night incase i wake somebody, its even worse in other peoples houses.

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If no one else is home and you have to go to the bathroom, but you're invested in what you're doing on your laptop, you take it with you.

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Look at a word and count the letters by 2's - continue counting the letters over and over by 2's until it comes out even at the end of the word.

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If im eating food i shouldnt and i dont want anybody to know i jump if anyone comes in and catches me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.