when i realise for example that my shoes are stinking i get really paranoid and try to cover them under the table or something because i feel that everyone is thinking about it or is covering their nose or stuff

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I stop the microwave at 1 second so that one someone else uses it it beeps

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Whenever I leave a phone message, I feel like I'm leaving the last message I will every leave to my family in my life because I will somehow die soon. I've watched too much drama.

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when bored, i imagine my EXACT plan for the zombie apocalypse, down to what would look cool if i was walking down a desolate street ( i am legend style) :D

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sometimes if I am going on a flight to another country I will hold a small pocket of air in my mouth before getting on the plane and then I would let it out after we land

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Poking your eye to see the black circle at the corner of your eye

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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resting your head from your face to your hand and then you realize you face now looks disfigured.

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Stick ur thumb between ur first and middle finger without realizing it

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Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

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Make a screeching noise with my mouth as I go around corners in my car too fast.

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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Try to use my "Brain Power" to pick up things when I am too lazy to get up and get them.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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I hate people who shows-off their SLR Cameras. I mean, so you're a human now because of that?

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sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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When I see interactive ads on webpages ( "Shoot 5 iPhones And Get One Free!" type of windows ), I feel compelled to finish the task, even though I KNOW it's going to open a pop-up and waste 10 seconds of my life.

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When taking a shower, and standing in the opposite direction where the water is coming fromY

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.