There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

Constantly refreshing the Captcha for fear that It'll be wrong and I have to redo everything I did.

Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

Wiggle my foot befor u go sleep in bed!!??

Being afraid to up-vote the embarrassing posts on this page for fear that it might somehow post onto my Facebook.

When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

sit on the toilet when taking a crap and play my iPod or laptop at the same time for something to do.

dont turn my fan up so high cause i think its going to fall and slice me to bits -jesse

Spell Checktells me I spelt something wrong even though I am certain it's right.

When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

I sometimes feel like I am the only one like me in this world

Realising that there are ASSHOLES posting dumb shit on this site.

Random strong urge to squeeze immensely cute pet.

Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

Lie in bed and wonder what happens whe you die, get depressed and come on this site for reassurance

Sometimes I think and feel that I am the most voted man on Horsehead Network, I got no idea why. Moral the friendly r*pist: I dnt know what that means though... Or do I? ;)

think something you shouldn't, then stop thinking it, because someone might read your mind

imagine a bunch of girls are watching you at home, so you don't look like a dumbass

run inside after taking out the trash because a monster might be hiding in the big trash can

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

I know how to type a ¿

I open the shower curtain when I get in the bathroom to make sure no ones there.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.