When I walk from one room to the next, I make believe that the room I just left exploded, and that I made it out just in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

thumb_up thumb_down -24

When i'm eating small, colored foods like skittles or gummies, i have to have one on each side of my mouth so one side doesn't feel happier than the other and they have to be different colors.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Become paranoid that this is not the real world, and instead is some coma induced dream.

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Create my response for the whole conversation before even having it

thumb_up thumb_down -54

I always go to sleep with every single one of my stuffed animals in my arms at the same time because I think that they get lonely and sad if I pick certain ones. Then again I sometimes wonder if they secretly hate me and think I'm a weird creep for hugging all of them every night. I'm 24.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

I get angry when people use question marks where they don't belong. QUESTION marks are for QUESTIONS. Not statements or opinions >:( "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion?" X FFFUU- "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion." ?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Breathe.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

penis

thumb_up thumb_down -150

Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

thumb_up thumb_down -39

watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

think about what im gonna say abillon times in my head before i say it -jesse

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

thumb_up thumb_down -48

When i'm home alone with the dog i have a conversation with the dog, sometimes in my head & sometimes out loud, in the voice that i think the dog would have if it could speak. Then sometimes i realise that i haven't checked if anybody else is home !

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Time a song on my MP3 player to be the soundtrack to something I'm about to do, especially in public places.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

thumb_up thumb_down -34

pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.