I cant ride a bike

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I have never watched Star Wars.

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

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Write my own music without literally writing it on something even though I'm only grade 3

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When people are whispering you think they are saying bad things

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Everytime I get new magazines or brochures in the mail I like to open them and smell them. Same with new electronics, I love that new smell.

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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when i eat, i sometimes switch which side of my mouth i chew my food with to even it out.

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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when i'm in a really good mood i think everybody is watching and admiring me

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Reherse jokes/phrases to say to friends in school tomorrow

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Say a word I just learned over and over again until it loses meaning.

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I like to sleep on the floor; my my cushion is too soft.

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Open Fridge, look around for few seconds, say to self - 'What the f*** am I doing?'

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When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

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Yell at game shows when the people are stupid

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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I have short haircuts so I don't have messed up hair in the morning (It's a real time saver)

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I'm a female. Sometimes I pee in the shower just so that I can try to aim my pee at the drain. This way I can imagine what it's like to pee with a doodle.

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wipe the bottle lid before i drink because i dont whant to taste what the other person had in there mouth...

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I feel like people next to me can read my mind so if I start thinking about something sexual it feels super awkward

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When I see someone with similar hair to mine, I stare at them from behind and try to figure out if that's what I look like from the back.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.