I know how to type a ¿

If I drop a piece of candy on the floor, I have to drop another piece so it won,t be lonely

See someone thats so hot all you can think about is seeing them naked all day.

cut corners when walking not because it's faster, but because it's more efficient

When Ive just intentionally committed some minor traffic offense (speeding, illegal U-turn) and suddenly worry a cop may have spotted me and act to myself in the car as if I was truly confused and have no idea what I did wrong, like moving my head around and saying, "Huh? Where's that house?"

worry about other people hearing you pee when your in the bathroom.

1.Open the fridge...nothing to eat :/ 2.Open the cabinet...nothing to eat :/ 3.Lower expectations..and then repeat :)

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

Get turned on lookin at my own butt

when I have to shred important documents I am still not satisfied that I even burn the shredded paper

Watched the woman in black then go to bed then suddenly a woman in black comes in my room oh wait it is just my mum saying good night

Smoking in the shower.

I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

I sometimes have bad dreams that for some reason I don't want to wake up from because I just want to see what happens next

I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

Get distracted during fap dreams and thinking of your mom and then going OMG GROSS OH GOD IM A PERV!!

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.