Fap and when you're done you feel ashamed and feel like you're wasting your life lol

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use the restroom at a different floor/building when taking a dump at work.

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Whenever i hear myself in a video or something to me, it sounds way higher pitched than when I hear myself talking Is it just me?

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I read the down voted posts

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

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every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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Imagine yourself and friends as band members while listening to songs.

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I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

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Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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Randomly agree for the Terms of Service for just about everything on the internet. Then becoming very frightened at the thought that you have violated them in some way.

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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If two cars towing boats were to crash into each other, Would that make it a boating accident?

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I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.