I pretend that my actions are perceived by a past self and they're always astounded by the change I've gone through.

thumb_up thumb_down +119

When I hear the doorbell ringing and I'm not expecting anyone, I turn off the tv/music and try not to make any sound, so they think there's no one home.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

not eating the ends of a hotdog.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

When I walk the streets after getting a new haircut, I think everybody's staring at me and thinking "oh my god she got a new haircut" eventhough they didn't know me before.

thumb_up thumb_down -146

After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When im blazed i like of all the stupid shit i did that day but always tell myself "its fine, i didnt feel dumb about those things sober"

thumb_up thumb_down -36

worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

thumb_up thumb_down -90

Pull the curtain right to the end so there are no gaps just in case some weirdo at night decides to look in my window.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

I aphabeticalize my shoes

thumb_up thumb_down -112

Yell at game shows when the people are stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Everytime I get in my car at night, I turn the light on and check behind the back seats to see if there's anyone waiting for me. Then lock the doors when all is safe.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

when you are waiting for something to load, you go "please,please,pleas,please,please,please...." and the when it finally finishes you yell "YES!" OF COURSE, ONLY WHEN YOUR ALONE.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

I like to create stories and adventures in my head to make reality a little less boring...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Turning on the dryers in the bathroom so no one will hear you peeing

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Lying in be and pretending you are in a tv show, the characters best friend, playing it out in your mind. Or you dream while awake, and you control it, and you fly to Hollywood and become your faborite celebrities best friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.