Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

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Look up definitions of acronyms in text messages or Facebook that I feel I should know because I'm teenager.

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When walking on the sidewalk, try to walk the same number of steps on each square without looking awkward. (now, this is sooo weird, I have no clue if ANYBODY has ever done this more than once)

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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I use two pillows as I sleep, but I don't put them under my head, I put my head in between them.

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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While listening to songs, your always thinking of a situation to go along with it.

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Look at a word long enough to not seem like a word anymore, then sounding weird.

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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I talk to my pet when no one is home.

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I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

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before going to a party, i rehearse the conversations i expect to have with the people who will be there (even though those conversations never actually happent)

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Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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Playing with a tiny piece of loose skin in the middle of my upper lip.

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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I'll sing nice and loud in the shower and wonder why I haven't come out with an album yet

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Spend way too much time on this website cause it makes you feel normal

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Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

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I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

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I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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Massive hang-over. Say out loud and promise I will never drink like that again. Next time drink atleast as much as the last time.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.