Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

Look up definitions of acronyms in text messages or Facebook that I feel I should know because I'm teenager.

When walking on the sidewalk, try to walk the same number of steps on each square without looking awkward. (now, this is sooo weird, I have no clue if ANYBODY has ever done this more than once)

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

I use two pillows as I sleep, but I don't put them under my head, I put my head in between them.

I sleep in my underpants every single night

While listening to songs, your always thinking of a situation to go along with it.

Look at a word long enough to not seem like a word anymore, then sounding weird.

put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

I talk to my pet when no one is home.

I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

before going to a party, i rehearse the conversations i expect to have with the people who will be there (even though those conversations never actually happent)

Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

Playing with a tiny piece of loose skin in the middle of my upper lip.

when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

I'll sing nice and loud in the shower and wonder why I haven't come out with an album yet

Spend way too much time on this website cause it makes you feel normal

Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

Massive hang-over. Say out loud and promise I will never drink like that again. Next time drink atleast as much as the last time.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.