Wearing cheap CZ rings to either stop guys hitting on me or pretend I'm engaged.

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Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

Ever played the sims, then wondered if you were just apart of a game and that maybe someone is controlling YOUR every move? Yeah. Me too.

I use chopsticks or disposable latex gloves to eat sandwiches, chocolate, basically any finger food, because in my opinion, it's impossible to get that greasy, sticky film off my fingers.

wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

Look at the time but have to look again 3 seconds later because you forgot.

I rehearse arguments in my head.

"Turn the tv volume with my feet" "Take a wood stick and think it's a sword"

When the car ride is silent, I wink with my right eye when I pass a sign on the right, and the opposite for the left. And then when there's a double yellow line, I close my eyes.

When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

Fart and walk away from the stink area very quickly so nobody will know you made it.

Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.

think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

Go up/down the stairs in 10 steps exactly. Talk to an imaginary girlfriend when I'm guilty of something, and she helps me out and holds me till I fall asleep.

Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

Do an epic air drum solo while listening to Phil Colins "In The Air Tonight"

when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on iend get really exccited on the last straight especielly when a rocky soundtrack song comes on

When I'm eating cereal, if some of the cereal gets stuck on the inside of the bowl above the rest I use the side of my spoon to push it down back into the milk.

i feel relived after i prick and see that hard-white thinggy that oozes outside my annoying acne.

I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.