Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

read on youtube comments with too unlikes

When writing out something in the air, you mess up so you "wipe" out the mistake and then move to another piece of air because it's "cleaner".

Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

when you are waiting for something to load, you go "please,please,pleas,please,please,please...." and the when it finally finishes you yell "YES!" OF COURSE, ONLY WHEN YOUR ALONE.

only read the short jokes on this website

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

Only use the left earphone.

give speeches in the sower for random awards you will never receive.

Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

Am I the only one who wrote "free Candy" on the side of my van?

Sex scene comes on TV while you are watching with your parents... Try to act normal... Fail.

fap

i draw pictures of pokemon on comments (\____/) (??????)

Attempting to start phychic conversations with people in public

when i'm at the computer i say out of loud what i'm typing

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Dancing while hoovering

If there's leaves on the ground and the wind picks it up and makes like swirls I put my arms out to make it seem I'm controlling the swirls.

Buy something and try to save it for an event of some kind and end up failing to do so, every darn time too.

When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

I scratch the scabs on my head whenever im bored

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.