imagine a bunch of girls are watching you at home, so you don't look like a dumbass

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grab my cats tongue when he is licking my hand

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Every new years eve I like to watch the date on my computer change all three the day, the month, and the year

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If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

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Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

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While waiting on someone I check my phone and if there is no new message I just read old ones, just to be occupied and don't look stupid or lost

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Think you're breathing way too loud when your headphones are turned up

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Sitting next to a banana called James

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Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

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The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

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Receiving or finding something cool in your dream, then waking up thinking you have it and realize you don't.

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When I'm in a car holding a handheld device (iPod, Cell Phone, etc.) I have a feeling I will randomly throw it out the open window. I would never do this, but I'm still afraid I might.

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

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Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

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see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

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Pick my scabs off and then lick the blood off.

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I scold or point at my electronics and tell them "No, bad!" whenever I push the wrong button or shut them off on accident.

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Going to a friends house for the weekend, coming home and checking the fridge/pantry for new foods.

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Agree with someones ridiculous political opinion just to avoid an argument.

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that time where you open the fridge door and stare at it for like 10 min then close it and walk away?

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When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.