DIY LOL
Clarksonisms
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Rate My Battlestation
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whenever im getting a haircut, i feel as if the barber can see my embarrassing and private thoughts.
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-56
Get worried i'll sleeptalk about the things I'm thinking about and someone will hear, so stop thinking about my deep and personal thoughts i think about before going to bed.
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-2
When I wait for something to load, I right click and then quickly try to drag a box around the right click box before it disappears. Then I try to right click and drag and see if I can outline the right click box before it appears.
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-68
When you say bye to someone and keep walking in the same direction, and then its really awkward...
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+1
Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?
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-30
Blast yur music in the car when you are alone but when someone pulls up next to you u turn it down so u don't make them think yur an ass
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-63
When I'm walking at night, I put up my hood and grin evilly at passing cars so it'll scare the drivers if they see
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+79
When watching a video or listening to music, take earbuds out four or five times in repetition to make sure that no one can hear the audio but you, then check them again when someone comes within twenty feet of you. Then, spend the rest of the time feeling awkward and expecting someone to jump out of the bushes and take a video of that idiot with the defective headphones.
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-56
Blow dry my dick and balls after getting out of the shower.
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-52
Show desktop when mom or dad walks in.
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-40
while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.
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-59
I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?
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-18
i make loud noises so before i fart people cant hear it.
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-48
suck my own penis
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+35
When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two
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-26
I have a cat that drops on it's side when she sees me coming
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+59
When I have a really good dream, and I wake up and realize it was a dream, I try to fall back asleep and re-visit the dream.
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+123
Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.
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-17
When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.
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-19
.don't like something because being scared that it appears on my wall.
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-60
Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.
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Before I go to bed at night, I close the closet door so the monsters inside don't come get me while I'm sleeping.
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+307
Smell your hands to see if there dirty.
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+12
I delete all notifications on my phone before i shut it off.
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-119
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.