When im in a room alone on the computer i like to put on songs and lip sync to them in the mirror with really emotional expressions..

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I eat one way in public and another way in private.

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When I check into a hotel room I think about the countless number of sex acts that has been performed in there.

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Made after doomsday plans

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Lay down in bed and get comfortable and then realize you have to pee.

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If I'm in my room and I need to fart, I walk into someone else's room and fart in there so that my room doesn't stink up.

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Whenever I'm holding two round objects, I try to juggle them.

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Run up all stairs two at a time, and memorize all the staircases with odd number of steps. On those, I start with one step so I can end on a two.

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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I wake up suddenly in the middle of the night with a feeling that I'm falling

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When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

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When you tell yourself that this is the last page you'll read and end up reading three more.

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"Turn the tv volume with my feet" "Take a wood stick and think it's a sword"

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Erasing the history cache on the computer after visiting an x rated website.

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Do an epic air drum solo while listening to Phil Colins "In The Air Tonight"

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I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

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Randomly think odd scenarios in your head and say if that happened this is what i would do and then forget about it the next day

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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wonder why the word "MORTGAGE" has a T in it?

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Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

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refuse to like a post because the number is too perfect and you don't want to screw it up

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.