Turn on Fox News and wonder if I'm watching a bad comedy routine or news reporting.

I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

I feel no shame that I am a camgirl online and bring in about $2800 a month just to flash guys my boobs. :)

give speeches in the sower for random awards you will never receive.

Fall asleep at night fantasizing about how you wish life situations would play out.

I always open up another tab on my browser, just in case I accidentally exit, so my computer can warn me that I will close 2 tabs.

When I climb into bed every night, I always say, "Bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed," while shifting until I am comfortablely settled. -Ikka

I open the shower curtain when I get in the bathroom to make sure no ones there.

Check an insane amount of times to see if the door is locked, then finally get back to jerking off.

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

Take out all the marshmallows in a bowl of Lucky Charms, eat the "cat food" (the dry cereal that looks like dry kitty food!), then put the marshmallows back in the milk and eat them!

Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

When driving and a song come on about death I switch the station because i'm afraid its going to happen to me

Take off the ends of the banana (

Put my hand under the pillow in bed to get orgasm

Wrap up inside a sleeping bag and slide down the steps.

I chew around the center of carrots.

When I'm home alone, I pretend I'm famous, and pretend I'm doing a television or magazine interview, and answer out loud to questions I ask in my head

When watching a video or listening to music, take earbuds out four or five times in repetition to make sure that no one can hear the audio but you, then check them again when someone comes within twenty feet of you. Then, spend the rest of the time feeling awkward and expecting someone to jump out of the bushes and take a video of that idiot with the defective headphones.

Lie in bed and wonder what happens whe you die, get depressed and come on this site for reassurance

Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.