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spank it during my commute if I am in traffic
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-6
Pee in my work garbage can.
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+583
i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5
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-25
When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other in the same way just to be fair to both hands
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+746
While reading these posts on here, I find that I do a lot of weird things that I've never really thought about.
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+770
I rape small children ;).
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-270
Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak
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-32
Think up a come back three days after it would have been useful.
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+800
Saying "ow" even though whatever happened did not actually hurt, but you thought that it would.
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+1,578
When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...
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-13
Laughing randomly because you remembered something that was funny earlier
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+1,397
Feel all cool and look suspiciously at everybody else while leaving the theater after a good dramatic movie.
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-39
I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.
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-61
Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.
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-12
I wish I was born again, but I had all of the knowledge I have now.
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+1,224
Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.
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-53
Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.
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+4
When I was little and I saw disney's hercules I had no idea why Meg was working for Hades
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-43
Whenever another person sitting next to me at school doesn't push their chair in when they get up to leave, I do it for them because it looks more orderly.
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+445
Sometimes i think i've been living a dream life, and one day im really gonna wake up in the middle of 9th grade math class and have to explain why i was sleeping on my desk and jerking off so much.
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+122
Give a 'thumbs up' or a 'thumbs down' based strictly on how much you like the number it will change it to.
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+268
think something you shouldn't, then stop thinking it, because someone might read your mind
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+1,338
When I poop I pretend to make my wiener talk.
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+996
Get that shiver when you're peeing.
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+222
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.