when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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the power to regenerate your appendix

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I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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When I'm walking along and just trip over my own foot I look back and pretend to look at whatever it was I tripped over.

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

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Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

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When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

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Every once in a while I think 'I know you're reading my mind...' and look about the classroom. See if anyone looks at me.

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When you are doing something (kind of weird) when you're alone and then stop because there might be a ghost watching.

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i always fall in my imaginations. whenever i think of something, e.g me walking to my room, i'd fall on my way there. what's wrong with me.....

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Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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Spend way too much time on this website cause it makes you feel normal

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Showering with my uncle Jarrett <3

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Sometimes, I ask myself philosophical questions. The one that is bugging me now is "If reincarnation is real, why is this life so vivid?"

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When home alone and you hear a noise getting out a gun/weapon.

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Rub boogers under the arm rest on the couch.

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I mute music videos and watch them to completely different music.

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Teacher asks class a question, so I put my head down and pretend to take notes.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.