Checking out peoples cars to try and figure out what kind of driver they are.

I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

Get distracted during fap dreams and thinking of your mom and then going OMG GROSS OH GOD IM A PERV!!

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

Putting your bra on your dogs dead

Kick the fallen ice cube underneath the fridge

When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

I am wearing ear buds even though I'm not actually listening to anything.

Can't seem to manage not throwing rocks into sea/river

shag your mom

Open the microwave at 1 second left to pretend you're on a bomb squad.

i cant fall asleep unless i suck my thumb...

I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

kick something under the fridge that you dont want to pick up

I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

Boring car ride? Read every food & drinks rapper you can find .

Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

k. everyone

When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.