I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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Absentmindedly rub your stomach while lying down watching or reading.

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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I hug-squeeze the bread to get all the air out before putting it away.

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Think to myself "If I would have stuck to my diet I would be at my goal weight by now"

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See someone thats so hot all you can think about is seeing them naked all day.

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Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

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I am wearing ear buds even though I'm not actually listening to anything.

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When I'm bored I argue with myself inside my head.

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i make loud noises so before i fart people cant hear it.

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Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

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Talks to yourself in your head then replies to yourself out loud nikki

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whenever I play I spy I always use very specific things I spy for example if I would say something starting with D and it would be for dust

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think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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I combine every item on my plate in all the possible ways, then i eat the worst part of the meal and save the best part til last.

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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When I notice that I have just breathed in/out, for the next minute or so I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to keep breathing.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.