I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

Absentmindedly rub your stomach while lying down watching or reading.

I rehearse arguments in my head.

Sleep with pillow between legs

I hug-squeeze the bread to get all the air out before putting it away.

Think to myself "If I would have stuck to my diet I would be at my goal weight by now"

See someone thats so hot all you can think about is seeing them naked all day.

Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

I am wearing ear buds even though I'm not actually listening to anything.

When I'm bored I argue with myself inside my head.

i make loud noises so before i fart people cant hear it.

Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

Talks to yourself in your head then replies to yourself out loud nikki

whenever I play I spy I always use very specific things I spy for example if I would say something starting with D and it would be for dust

think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

I combine every item on my plate in all the possible ways, then i eat the worst part of the meal and save the best part til last.

Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

When I notice that I have just breathed in/out, for the next minute or so I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to keep breathing.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.