Get distracted during fap dreams and thinking of your mom and then going OMG GROSS OH GOD IM A PERV!!

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

I constantly try to turn something I say into my catch phrase.

Eating a crunchy food while watching tv and turning up the volume little by little until its around 80% because you can't hear over the sound of your own chewing. Then later when you turn back on the tv you scare yourself because it's still at 80% and frantically try to turn it down with super speed before anyone hears you.

Takes playful flirting way to seriouse.

Does anyone else's mouse hand get colder then their other hand when they're on the computer?

Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

I talk excessively loud in public sometimes so people can hear my opinions. I'm just hoping someone's eavesdropping because I like the fact that they might agree with me and that they get to see a little bit of who I am. I don't even know these people.

I take receipts out of the ATM's disposal slot in order to see how much money people that I've never met have in their accounts.

When I see someone with similar hair to mine, I stare at them from behind and try to figure out if that's what I look like from the back.

Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

Whenever I read creepy pastas and there is a picture after the story I get afraid to look at it than when I do I freak out thinking it's going to eat me. Than when I look at it I shout FUUUUUUU.. Than look at it some more and I burst out laughing seeing its a fucking dumb picture.

Wrap up inside a sleeping bag and slide down the steps.

Say 'WED', 'NES' and 'DAY' slowly in your head when spelling Wednesday.

I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

Every time I see people's bare feet I'm automatically counting their toes to make sure if they have an extra toe or two.

do math problems in my head while having sex to keep from coming

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.