walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

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Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

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I masturbate with sandpaper

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When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

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When I'm scared in the shower sing

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Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

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tell everyone that you think that mcdonalds is unhealthy and that you think there food is nasty but in reality you actually love it.

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I walk into a room and forget why I'm in there.

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Tried to stuff yourself in the fridge

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Whenever I walk through automatic doors I say "Thank You"

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Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

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I fake laugh at peoples jokes when they're not funny to avoid akward moments.

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Peeing in the shower

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I mustn't step on the cracks in the pavement

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fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

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I'm in computer class at school right now. I'm supposed to be making up for incomplete assignments. But I have been on Things only you think you do, Funny Exams, DIY Fail, Pointless Super powers, Explain this image, and Perfectly Time Photos all class class period. I just noticed these websites aren't blocked at school.

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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Walking past a light switch, but miss when try to turn the lights on so you just keep walking instead.

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Turn the light off, run, and JUMP into bed. I'm 26.

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.