Watching tv with family/friends and laughing at something on the show, and then feeling awkward because no one else laughed.

Think someone's watching me so I do cool stuff to impress them just in case they are

I tilt my head back and eat grapes pretending like im a greek god

Check an insane amount of times to see if the door is locked, then finally get back to jerking off.

I never let anything go over the toilet when It's open.

Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

when your walking past a chain link fence you slide your fingers along it because it feels cool

Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

When I am in a car i always think there is massive swords coming out the edge of the car and make everything the same length up

Getting the strong urge to "woo" or scream in a large and quiet crowd, such as during church.

Sometimes when you are looking down at a book or something you look up because you think you saw a person. Nope it was a tall lamp with a coat hung on it. Find youself periodically looking up every 5 minutes to make sure.

outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

something happens with a person that u were close to but then they become an asshole, u get mad, and when u stop talking feel really depressed even though u hate them

Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

put a load of loo roll in the loo before taking a dump at work so it silences the landing.

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

Sometimes when it's very windy, i Loudly yell "Stop". The Wind most often seem to lower it's intensity or completely blow off.

i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

never feel sad enough after being told a sad story

Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.