Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

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I tuck all sides of the blanket under my body and feet then over my head and leave a fresh air hole so im in a cocoon of blanket.

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Never using a 0 or a 5 as the last digit while using a microwave.

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find a nice photograph of food from the web and post it on fb just to watch my retard friends make a big deal out of it.

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Reading the terms of service :O....

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When I am driving, I hate everyone else who is driving.

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when i take a shit and smoke i dont throw the cigar in the wc so the smoke wont come to my nose

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I was not born in the country I am living in now

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I look at my phone screen when i'm in an uncomfortable situation, and five minutes later i have to look again cause somebody asks what time it is.

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

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look at bins as i walk past them

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I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

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Start to tell a story, but realize that nobody is bothering to listen to you.. So you slowly let your voice fade off

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When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

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Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

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OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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Every time I switch pages on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com, I always end up reading If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there.

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Get freaked out when door bell or phone rings when you are doing something you are not supposed to.

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I put salt on buttered toast...

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I turn on the faucet or turn up the radio in the bathroom so maybe no one can hear me pee.

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watch cartoons even though most of my friends don't

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Pretend that when you are in the shower, the shower head is a giant machine gun, that takes thousands of men to operate, and that you were an extremely large person and you catch ALL of the bullets in your mouth, spitting them at the shower head while at the same time turning off the water as if they all died, and the small drips that continue to drop out were the dead soldires' blood.....-dillon

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.