- Things You Think Only You Do

Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

only turning the TV volume to numbers ending in 5

Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

Being afraid to close your eyes when you're washing your hair in the shower because you think a murderer will be right there when you open your eyes again. That or Scared to shower when your home alone at night.

Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

when you can't think of anything to type you just type random letters. a;lsdfj;ldfkjsfasdfljf

While peeing, I will sometimes flush the toilet mid-stream and see if I can finish before it flushes all the way.

Sometimes cringe at the sound when other people scratch themselves

When your alone in the house you walk around naked even though there is no point

do a fake cough when my shit is falling in the toilet

Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

Eat my shed skin from a sunburn

Act as if you don't notice her, but you really are dying to take another look at her.

if someone i like or want to impress is around i change the song I'm listening to to something that i know they like or something not embarrassing, just in case they ask me what i'm listening to.

When the car runs over bumps in the road on the freeway, they sound like horses hooves, so I pretend my car's being pulled by invisible horses.

when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

If I am waiting on someone and they are late, I start mentally listing their faults, flaws and mistakes but feel kind of bad for doing it when they finally show up.

I translate (parts of) songs into different languages in my head. I try to do it as good as possible.

Before I go to bed at night, I close the closet door so the monsters inside don't come get me while I'm sleeping.

I wonder if a blind person knows how colors look?

Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.