When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

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Write something down here so that it seems like you think its normal when your actually really paranoid that its not.

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when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

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Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

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I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

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When you look at the sidewalk and try to step on the boxes instead of the lines, and feel like you need to do it a number of times per leg to make it even.

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Whenever I'm home alone, I listen to songs from my culture like Ella Ella, Taboo, or Sexy Robotica by Don Omar or other fun dancing songs, super loud and dance crazy and sing along as loud as I can. Any one else?

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I wonder if we're actually just dolls and are being controlled by some little girl in her little doll house ....

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Checking your phone for a text when you know you don't have one. Matt

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Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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I dip my pizza crust in soda

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When i feel the back of my right hand starting to itch. in a few days, i get some money. When the back of my left hand itches.Some money goes.

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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Randomly flexing random muscles after long time of sitting at the computer

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Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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I really enjoy taking a shit and dont really know why.

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Turning on the TV for background noise when I'm on my computer.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.