Watching tv with family/friends and laughing at something on the show, and then feeling awkward because no one else laughed.

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Think someone's watching me so I do cool stuff to impress them just in case they are

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I tilt my head back and eat grapes pretending like im a greek god

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Check an insane amount of times to see if the door is locked, then finally get back to jerking off.

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I never let anything go over the toilet when It's open.

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Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

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when your walking past a chain link fence you slide your fingers along it because it feels cool

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Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

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When I am in a car i always think there is massive swords coming out the edge of the car and make everything the same length up

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Getting the strong urge to "woo" or scream in a large and quiet crowd, such as during church.

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Sometimes when you are looking down at a book or something you look up because you think you saw a person. Nope it was a tall lamp with a coat hung on it. Find youself periodically looking up every 5 minutes to make sure.

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outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

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something happens with a person that u were close to but then they become an asshole, u get mad, and when u stop talking feel really depressed even though u hate them

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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put a load of loo roll in the loo before taking a dump at work so it silences the landing.

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Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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Sometimes when it's very windy, i Loudly yell "Stop". The Wind most often seem to lower it's intensity or completely blow off.

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

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Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

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never feel sad enough after being told a sad story

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Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.