Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

When i need to poop i place toilet paper over the water so it doesn't splash up and hit my rectum.

Walking with your friend talking about everything then you and your friend walk by someone you don't know and it gets awkwardly quiet

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

I think people especially my parents, can hear my thoughts

Zoning out while looking at something and then trying to find the spot you were looking at when you're out of the zone but you can't find it.

stand in front of a mirror with your headphones in, and lip sync the words of the song playing to pretend you are singing in a music video

No matter how complicated your shower is at home, you always find it much easier to work than other people's showers.

I take receipts out of the ATM's disposal slot in order to see how much money people that I've never met have in their accounts.

Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

I masturbate with sandpaper

When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

When I'm scared in the shower sing

Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

tell everyone that you think that mcdonalds is unhealthy and that you think there food is nasty but in reality you actually love it.

I walk into a room and forget why I'm in there.

Tried to stuff yourself in the fridge

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.