Feel like puhing the crap out of people who talk loud in public places.

When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

slow down in front of automatic doors thinking they won't open and then rushing through when they do so you don't look stupid

Ur mum

I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

I pretend that someone can see through my eyes whenever I'm doing something cool, i guess so they think I'm cooler or something.

when singing to music on my ipod, i sometimes pause the music to hear how loud I am singing.

Convince yourself that all of your friends are partying together without you when they dont respond to your text messages.

Think about the things you could do if you had the power to stop the time.

I twist my pubes into little spikes when I pee.

I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

I type a comment here and secretly feel special

Singing alone in the car and then stopping, scared that there is an audio recorder in the car recording you singing.

When i need to poop i place toilet paper over the water so it doesn't splash up and hit my rectum.

I say my first name every night before I go to sleep because I want it to be the last thing I say before I die.

I stay vigilant while i shower in case killer/zombies come into my house..

Sit on the loo and think about life because I can't be bothered to get up

I think I have superpowers and sometimes I try to use them by force, like lifting a pencil with my mind or elevate from the ground.

I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

Saving some leftovers of your favorite food .... the next week its still there (:

When someone is talking to me and I'm not really listening, when it gets quiet I say 'that's crazy' so they think I'm listening.

i use dental dams

Wishing you could go back in time and do a situation over again, becuase you regret the stuff you did.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.