I flick through the channels on my TV really fast to try and make a complete sentence.

Even if it's something as innocent as a simple google search, I'm still inexplicably terrified when my parents draw near and could potentially see it. I silently flip out and frantically hide it like it's porn or something. ..And I don't even look at porn :I

When I need to poop in a public toilet, I poop to the side so there's no plop.

Whenever I am in a conversation with someone, be it a family member, close friend, or stranger, I nearly always imagine either starting a random brawl with them for no reason (i.e. punching them in the face) or making out with them or something, neither of which I would ever consider doing. Am I alone?

Mispronounce a word that you have a billion times before because you couldn't figure out what it said for a second.

on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

Thinking about what you want to dream about while brushing your teeth at night.

Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

When walking along, I try to race someone walking towards me. For example, a letter box is ahead of me and there is someone walking towards me. I will try and reach the letter box before the other person without looking awkward.. then feel like God if I manage to do it.

When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

Love the Twilight books, HATE the movies.

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

When ever my boyfriend doesn't reply to a text for a few hours I always imagine a worse case scenario and end up crying hystaricaly.

While I am busy working I like to have music playing and while I type I type to the song and its beat

Accidentally turning the fan on instead of the light when you walk into the bathroom and having a mini-spazz attack because the sound scares you.

while taking a bath, I imagine my knees, belly, arms etc poking out of the water are islands, and i imagine little people running around on them

Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

When your sitting on the toilet you watch a video,or read something on your ipod/ipad/etc

Have a big twitch, freak out when you are dosing off in class but suddenly wake up.

Pour a bowl of cereal. Open fridge. No milk. (karky)

when u start laughing then start clapping and look like a seal

When they say the name of the movie in the movie i get excited o.O

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.