Check the toilet paper after wiping your ass

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I can't get out of bed in the mornings unless the alarm clock reads 0 or 5.

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I always feel a little twinge of regret when I see "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service," because I know it's a lie.

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Think something that you REALLY don't want to think and hurriedly force your mind to change its thoughts.

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when i eat, i sometimes switch which side of my mouth i chew my food with to even it out.

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i run my 2 fingers across a wall like they're ninja feet when im happy.

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I dip my pizza crust in soda

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Look at my eyes really close in the mirror and turn the lights off, wait, and then back on just watch my pupils change size. PS: Really? No way - I could've sworn I was the only weirdo who did that!

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i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

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Give a 'thumbs up' or a 'thumbs down' based strictly on how much you like the number it will change it to.

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The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

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Sometimes I imagine how everyone would react if I died.

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When I see myself in the mirror, I have to make a funny face just to make sure my face still works.

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Saying "ow" even though whatever happened did not actually hurt, but you thought that it would.

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Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

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Put toilet paper in the toilet before i poop so the water dosent splash

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I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

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I get mad at characters on tv and i shoot the screen with my Nerf gun

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when singing to music on my ipod, i sometimes pause the music to hear how loud I am singing.

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When I've had an argument with someone I'll play it over in my head and come up with new responses. Then, sometimes my reenactment will get so heated that i start yelling my new arguments, and geting even more angry then before.

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Turn the Microwave off at 1 second

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I can't brush my teeth with the toilet lid up.

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When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

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Whenever someone is making a speech, I imagine them being taken out by a sniper mid-speech...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.