sing in the shower

Before I go to bed at night, I close the closet door so the monsters inside don't come get me while I'm sleeping.

When I see myself in the mirror, I have to make a funny face just to make sure my face still works.

Sometimes, after I say "bye" to a person on facebook, I wait a few seconds before I log off so that it seems like I said "bye" to other people too. Because I'm just that popular.

Write something down here so that it seems like you think its normal when your actually really paranoid that its not.

Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

I never turn in a complete circle. If I did, I would have to turn around in the other direction to "erase" the first circle

Every room I go into I imagine like there's one of those DVD screen savers that bounces off the walls and i try to guess when it will hist a corner perfectly

Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

I talk to inanimate objects daily.

Stick my hand all the way to the bottom of a tub of grease.

Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

I dip my pizza crust in soda

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.