When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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I can't brush my teeth and rinse in the sink right after I flush the toilet, for fear of it being connected somehow, and rinsing with my own piss.

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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I vote thumb dlown the ones that i dong like

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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if i put my shirt on backwards, instead of taking my shirt off and putting it on right, i pull my arms in and just spin my shirt.

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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I lie in bed and when I get bored I try to convince myself that I'm lying at the other end

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After having an argument with your partner you text them later then halfway thru the text you forget hat you were going to say back track and tell them you love them! "didn't matter really did it lol"

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

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fap

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Create a little story/scenario in your head abbout someone you like or want to meet, while lying to go to sleep.

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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when u start laughing then start clapping and look like a seal

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When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

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Wondering what would happen if you did something super random or inappropriate in a group setting. :)

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I approach balcony ledges with my feet firmly planted, just in case a random person decides to come pick me up and throw me off the balcony.

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.