Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

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I think Lois Griffin on Family Guy is hot!

when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

when watching a movie in a big screen cinema, i unconsciously look at the bottom of the screen, midway through the movie, expecting to see a time/track/scroll bar. as if it was VLC media player.

do things without turning the lights on and feel like a ninja.

arrange certain social situations with attractive girls just to make spank bank deposits.

Create the perfect song/poem/philosophical theory/scientific discovery right before you fall asleep and forget it in the morning.

masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

when liking something you like or dislike something you click it twice even though you know it will only take one vote

see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

put my headphones in but don't listen to any music so people don't bother me.

Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

When I am bored, I imagine saving my crush' s life and we live happily ever after. :( what an idiot I am

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

Think something that you REALLY don't want to think and hurriedly force your mind to change its thoughts.

Show desktop when mom or dad walks in.

spank it during my commute if I am in traffic

Mouth words to people wearing headphones to try and get them to take them off.

think about all of the things you would do if you were the only person on earth

reading the back of the cereal box when eating cereal

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.