If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

When making something I pretend I'm making a YouTube video of it and pretend I am getting lots of views

whenever I play I spy I always use very specific things I spy for example if I would say something starting with D and it would be for dust

Okay so probably like everyone else, when Schapelle Corby was found with drugs on her in bali I thought she was innocent but now since she was let out of the prison I am wondering if she did do it?

Not sure if im holding on to fart or shit

I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

You laugh to yourself when you think you are alone in a street but then you notice somebody in a car looking at you.

When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

I wipe the part of the glass or water bottle i drink from

Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

Eat or drink something tpretending it's some sort of fuel that'll give you powers.

you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

Go on Omegle video chat and worry that you'll see someone you know

try to cut corners in my house and hit the wall

After I flush the toilet, I run out of the bathroom really fast.

Have to catch my significant other when they lie, not because I really care but to prove I'm smarter

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.