Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

when you say something and they go what? so you repeat it and they still didn't hear but once you say "forget it" they suddenly understood you perfectly.

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

Yelling my cats name in my mind to see if i can get him to look at me using the power of my mind

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

think about all of the things you would do if you were the only person on earth

I like to food shop between midnight and 5 am

when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

I eat ass

when bored, i imagine my EXACT plan for the zombie apocalypse, down to what would look cool if i was walking down a desolate street ( i am legend style) :D

Sometimes when my mom is aking me something and then i tell her the truth i start smirking automatically as if i'd be lying because i don't know how to make a serious face

Wipe drink can with shirt after someone (mainly father) has had a sip.

When nobodys home, stay as quiet as possible just in case an intrudor is hiding somewhere

I make weird crazy faces at myself in the mirror whenever I leave the bathroom.

when i'm at the computer i say out of loud what i'm typing

Inspect the mirrors in store changing rooms in case they are one-way glass. Make faces into mirror as if you know they're back there.

Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

Imagine yourself and friends as band members while listening to songs.

Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

Time a song on my MP3 player to be the soundtrack to something I'm about to do, especially in public places.

Being afraid to close your eyes when you're washing your hair in the shower because you think a murderer will be right there when you open your eyes again. That or Scared to shower when your home alone at night.

When your alone in the house you walk around naked even though there is no point

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.