When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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I'm 30, but to this day I still have fantasies about rescuing the girl that I'm secretly in love with from a dangerous situation. The fantasies get increasingly ridiculous, sometimes they even involve superhero stuff. It's as if my own mind was trying to let me know that I should grow the f*** up.

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Looking at this naked with a cat on you're lap.

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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When I'm watching an episode of a show that I've seen before with a friend, I say a part that is coming up ahead and act like I guessed.

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Whenever I'm doing my makeup I pretend I'm doing a makeup tutorial on Youtube.

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Every time I open a door, I shout out "Alohamora!" and then I open it.

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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Wishing you could go back in time and do a situation over again, becuase you regret the stuff you did.

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Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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Here's a fun game I play if I wake up in the middle of the night: I look over at the alarm clock and see what numbers are displayed. Then I shut my eyes tightly and wait a few seconds before opening them again. If I open my eyes and see that the numbers on the alarm clock have changed, I win. If I open my eyes and they didn't, I lose.

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Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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I tilt my head back and eat grapes pretending like im a greek god

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I hate other people's mirrors, they make me look different

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I click my teeth to music

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I hate it whenever i hear Manny Paquiao saying "you know" in every interviews he make. Am i the only one who notice it?

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i feel relived after i prick and see that hard-white thinggy that oozes outside my annoying acne.

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At the peak of orgasm, i used to think that im making out with someone else (like my crush) to make me cum.

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Never using a 0 or a 5 as the last digit while using a microwave.

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When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

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I pee in the shower.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.