Turn the light off, run, and JUMP into bed. I'm 26.

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Doing something private and think "What if my mom/dad/boss etc. saw me now?"

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I give my own posts a thumbs up whenever I have the option and I know that it's anonymous.

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Wear hoods and sweatshirts in the middle of summer

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Wish that Mexicans would go fix things in their own country instead of coming here unwelcome and demanding things instead.

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I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

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When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

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Love feet. like LOVE feet.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Try to balance on and off on the light switch.

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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I say my first name every night before I go to sleep because I want it to be the last thing I say before I die.

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Have a fantasy where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart while Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum.

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Whenever I am in a conversation with someone, be it a family member, close friend, or stranger, I nearly always imagine either starting a random brawl with them for no reason (i.e. punching them in the face) or making out with them or something, neither of which I would ever consider doing. Am I alone?

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When on a long car ride, i tend to look out the window and imagine that i am running on the side of the car and doing flips and other types of parkour to keep up with my car...

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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When the hero of a movie is drowning I hold my breath to see if I would survive.

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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I have seen one of my submissions listed under "Quotes from other sites"

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Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

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When I'm driving through traffic lights that are green, I use my psychic powers to make them change so no one behind me gets through.

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See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

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When I walk into the bathroom and the lid of toilet is closed, I always get slightly nervous to lift it up and see into the toilet. I'm always thinking there'll be something disgusting or scary in there.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.