I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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Turn on the faucet and/or fan when using the toilet at someone else's house or at my own place when there is a visitor because I don't want them to hear me peeing.

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You imagine your future self visiting you and tell you about your life.

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Fantasizing about your friends in like 25 years telling there teenage kids about growing up and being friends with you. When you are a huge rich and famous star.

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I like eating chicken clubs with my hands and dip them in ketchup while pretending I am a caveman

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Stalk boyfriend's facebook, go to everything he's commented on, and comment too.

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On YouTube when I go to like a comment or a video. I click the Like button 2 or 3 times just to make sure it went through.

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Too lazy to exercise. Think to self "I'm gonna work out tomorrow." - instantly feel better about self. Still didn't exercise.

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I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

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Check the time on my cell phone, put it back in my pocket. Dammit, didn't see the time. Check it again.

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Having to step on snails to hear the crunch

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Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

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if i put my shirt on backwards, instead of taking my shirt off and putting it on right, i pull my arms in and just spin my shirt.

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When I am home alone and I hear something upstairs, I pretend my Dad is here and say really loudly, "Hey Dad! When are you going to your violent national wrestling match tonight?!"

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Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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I talk to myself while playing games so I don't feel lonley!

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

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Remembering that you're breathing and then it stops being subconscious so you have to purposely breathe until you stop thinking about it.

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Try to put in USB drive into computer, and no matter what, always ends up trying to put it in upside-down the first time.

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While making yourself something to eat that takes more than 5 minuets to make. Pretending that you have your own show on a cooking station and talk like your talking to the audience the whole time.

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Blast yur music in the car when you are alone but when someone pulls up next to you u turn it down so u don't make them think yur an ass

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when playing games like grand theft auto I drive normally like all the other people in the game when i'm bored

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.