Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

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When I drop something, I stand there and watch it fall, I stand still because I'm afraid that I'll maybe mess up something else, instead of picking it up quickly. Am I the only one? ;)

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Whenever I send or receive texts, I always make it a point to have more received texts than sent ones. It makes me feel popular.

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eat curry and don't complain about its spiciness ...if you're not white

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I make weird crazy faces at myself in the mirror whenever I leave the bathroom.

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only turning the TV volume to numbers ending in 5

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When I'm walking I pretend that I'm staying in the same place and moving the world beneath me.

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

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Checking out peoples cars to try and figure out what kind of driver they are.

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rub the underside of your ear lobe to smell the odd smell.

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if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

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I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

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speak proper english

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check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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I pee in the water of the toilet to make bubbles

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When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

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text somebody something and if they don't reply quickly, resend that same text.

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wonder if anyone is on at 12 A.M. log on to a social network and realize that theres a lot of people on

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sneeze without closing my eyes

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.