Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

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looking at the bottom when i meet foreigners talking among themselves... dang. no subtitles.

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Constantly check your post on here to see if other people give it a response.

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Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

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i use my thumb when using a DS instead of using the stylus

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dont turn my fan up so high cause i think its going to fall and slice me to bits -jesse

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Fall asleep at night fantasizing about how you wish life situations would play out.

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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When you can't be bothered to go to the toilet so you stay watching tv or going on your laptop while trying to hold it in.

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Say you're not hungry at a friend's house when his/her parents offer you food, even though you're starving

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If I'm doing something that involves two ppl i race even if the other person doesn't know it and if i win i get a huge ass grin which is awkward sometimes

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In the car and sad song comes on you look out the window and pretend your in a movie.

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I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

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when singing to music on my ipod, i sometimes pause the music to hear how loud I am singing.

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Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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Breathe.

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Thinking about what other poeple are doing right now... Like someone solving world hunger and your sitting there playing games and having fun with friends that are nice and healthy.

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only read the short jokes on this website

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When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

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I poop on the side of my house in the morning so I do not have to make noise then come back in.

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Sometimes I think the whole world is set up, and I feel like I'm living in some kind of Truman Show. I even sometimes say "I know you're there" to the moon.

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Whenever i am watching TV my parents always walk by at the worst part like a sex scene or a dirty joke.

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I very carefully smell what I'm about to eat before I eat it, but I'd most likely eat it, even if I hadn't smelled it first.

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Whenever i hear myself in a video or something to me, it sounds way higher pitched than when I hear myself talking Is it just me?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.