Pretend i'm a sim.

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Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

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When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

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I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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When I post something on this site, I always do the thumb up at my own post.

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Run back into your room when your microwaving something

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I have a phobia of incest

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You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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When you are thinking, and you think about what you are thinking. You are automatically purposely thinking until you stop thinking about it. I am thinking about thinking about how I think right now. I think...

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when I'm walking i always try to step over the cracks with the same foot every time

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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wonder how old the people r who right these. im 12

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When in the shower, try to cross your arms and keep them as high up to your head as you can. Fill them with water and drink from it.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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Fall asleep at night fantasizing about how you wish life situations would play out.

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wonder who wrote these things

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Poop naked.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.