I have seen a UFO

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sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

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I look at people and think, "they poop" then as I'm imagining them pooping I hurry and change thoughts before they finish.

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When taking a shower, and standing in the opposite direction where the water is coming fromY

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When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

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Looking outside the window and imagining a huge explosion destroy everything and then u surviving and trying to find a way to survive

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I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

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When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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When nobody's home I blast the stereo and sing as loud as I can.

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Sit there with my hand just resting down my pants casually when I'm alone. It's comfy!

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I used to pretent my legs didn't work and pulled myself up the stairs with just my hands.

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you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

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Check the toilet paper after wiping your ass

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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I always feel a little twinge of regret when I see "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service," because I know it's a lie.

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think something you shouldn't, then stop thinking it, because someone might read your mind

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Music is ALWAYS playing in my head. I can't go a day without noticing that the whole time a song is just burned in my brain, playing over and over. Is this okay? Im pretty sure im the only one...

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sniff my armpit when somebody says someone stinks and shouts NOT ME lol

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I only make the tv volume in multiples of 5.

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Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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ASMR

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Whenever I am in a conversation with someone, be it a family member, close friend, or stranger, I nearly always imagine either starting a random brawl with them for no reason (i.e. punching them in the face) or making out with them or something, neither of which I would ever consider doing. Am I alone?

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When someone is reading something out loud in class...and they are reading REALLY slow...You quietly read fast and you try to beat them to the end of the paragraph

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.