Even if it's something as innocent as a simple google search, I'm still inexplicably terrified when my parents draw near and could potentially see it. I silently flip out and frantically hide it like it's porn or something. ..And I don't even look at porn :I

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Whenever I am in a conversation with someone, be it a family member, close friend, or stranger, I nearly always imagine either starting a random brawl with them for no reason (i.e. punching them in the face) or making out with them or something, neither of which I would ever consider doing. Am I alone?

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Mispronounce a word that you have a billion times before because you couldn't figure out what it said for a second.

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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Thinking about what you want to dream about while brushing your teeth at night.

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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When walking along, I try to race someone walking towards me. For example, a letter box is ahead of me and there is someone walking towards me. I will try and reach the letter box before the other person without looking awkward.. then feel like God if I manage to do it.

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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Love the Twilight books, HATE the movies.

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Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

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While I am busy working I like to have music playing and while I type I type to the song and its beat

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Accidentally turning the fan on instead of the light when you walk into the bathroom and having a mini-spazz attack because the sound scares you.

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When your sitting on the toilet you watch a video,or read something on your ipod/ipad/etc

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Have a big twitch, freak out when you are dosing off in class but suddenly wake up.

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when u start laughing then start clapping and look like a seal

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kick something under the fridge that you dont want to pick up

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Get the feeling that somebody is going to grab your foot when you walk by a bed in the dark...

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Apply hand sanitizer after fapping.

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I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

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I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

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I can't leave the volume on anything on a odd number.

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I pick my nose n eat it. I love the hard ones

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.