when walking up to an automatic door, you sweep your hand towards to the door when it opens, you feel like the Force is with you.

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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laziness .... its all in the mind

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Scratch my ass/armpit and HAVE to smell it.

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

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Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

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When the adverts come on I forget what I'm watching and so spend five minutes trying to remember.

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

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i randomly grab my boobs when i'm home alone. like, all the time.

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I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

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Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

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Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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I pretend I'm a musical when I'm alone and sing about all the stuff I'm doing.

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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Pee in the shower

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Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.