I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Ask someone "what" when they tell you something even though you heard them clearly

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Turn on Fox News and wonder if I'm watching a bad comedy routine or news reporting.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Has anyone else ever wondered why the women in shows and movies lie with the blanket covering them after apparently having sex with the other person.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When I am bored, usually in class, I simulate what I would do if the zombie apocalypse was occurring right now.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

When In the car, use th bug guts to ramp up all of the culverts and when you don't have a landing for a while, pretend that you got a speed bonus and are soaring with some amazing air.-dillon

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

thumb_up thumb_down -87

For some reason, I smile whenever I'm telling someone bad news or a sad story. I always try to not smile, but it doesn't work and I feel like a terrible person.

thumb_up thumb_down +359

Think to myself "If I would have stuck to my diet I would be at my goal weight by now"

thumb_up thumb_down -68

While peeing, I will sometimes flush the toilet mid-stream and see if I can finish before it flushes all the way.

thumb_up thumb_down +959

When I'm bored I think of what it would be like to be a women.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Pick my nose with my elbow, that way I keep my nails clean.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

When I'm in the shower and I hear a noise I automatically think someone broke into my house and killed my family and that they're coming for me and I will have to fight off the killer naked.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

thumb_up thumb_down -93

How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

thumb_up thumb_down -15

When you start wondering if you're in a dream and suddenly feel trapped

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

thumb_up thumb_down -19

When I loose something , I buy a new one, then continue to find the old one the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.