wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

Somehow can't find anything good to eat after going grocery shopping... even if you buy Oreos

Get excited when the clock reads 12:34. especially when its a digital that can also read 12:34.56.

I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

Walk into a public bathroom and go to the urinal, but then stop and think theres some guy who will perv on you and then go in the cubicle.

Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

Play poly-rhythmic drum beats along with my turn signal on my car.

Wearing cheap CZ rings to either stop guys hitting on me or pretend I'm engaged.

Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

I hold my breath in elevators

Read through all these posts and get all excited when you see things that you thought only you did

Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

Instead of scratching my balls with my hand I rub them vigorously on the bed

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.