carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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Check this site often to see if anyone liked my comment or not...

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After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

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When I'm bored I think of what it would be like to be a women.

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when i eat, i sometimes switch which side of my mouth i chew my food with to even it out.

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Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

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I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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when home alone, I sing a song like im performing it in front of a crowd of a thousand people and any object nearby usually becomes my microphone

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Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

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Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

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when i realise for example that my shoes are stinking i get really paranoid and try to cover them under the table or something because i feel that everyone is thinking about it or is covering their nose or stuff

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Get that shiver when you're peeing.

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Be a loner at school

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When you say bye to someone and keep walking in the same direction, and then its really awkward...

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Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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When eating skittles and share it with my friends, i gave them the flavors that i dont really like.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.