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When your the only one home and you hear a slight creak be like I HEARD THAT to scare of any serial killers.
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-31
Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...
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-38
Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.
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-56
Sometimes I wonder who created words. For instance, who thought to call a fence a fence? It could have been called something completely random like bucxbuw, but it would seem normal to us and fence would seem like jibberish instead.
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+48
Having cool food in your house and knowing your boyfriend is going to call you around 6 or so, so you start eating said awesome food at about 5:57. That way when your boyfriend asks what you're doing to can tell him you're eating _____ and he'll want to come over.
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-62
Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.
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-41
Watched the woman in black then go to bed then suddenly a woman in black comes in my room oh wait it is just my mum saying good night
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-68
Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo
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+9
Normally I can do a specific task no problem but when someone is watching and I know that they are watching I screw up.
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-74
Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."
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-67
On the bus think in your mind "I know you're reading my mind right now," and look for reactions.
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-52
I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.
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-69
Having a dream where I am in a sex Ed class and instead of looking at slides experiencing everything firsthand
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-89
Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.
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-44
I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.
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-44
I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".
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-39
You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.
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+4
Go through funny pictures and memes on Facebook, and then accidently miss one and ten when you click to go back you have to go through like 5 more to get back to the one you want.
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-50
When you try to blur eyes and keep them like that when you look around the room.
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-59
Think I'm going to fall down when I step onto an esculator that's not moving.
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-18
Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.
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-46
I T-bag my teammates in MW3 when they die.
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-45
when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops
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+9
losing something in the house, looking for it and then for some reason if I can't find it, I look in all the same places again
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.