Play poly-rhythmic drum beats along with my turn signal on my car.

Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

I type things i really want to say to people and then delete them straight away because im too chicken to say it.

I don't like to sit with my back to the door incase someone or something sneeks up behind me, it's even worse with headphones on.

I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

Go into a card shop, laugh hysterically at the funny ones, then leave. Then whilst walking down the street, you think of them again and burst out laughing. This is highly embarrassing when you're alone!

In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

I feel bad for not reading the terms of service on a website, because someone had to put a lot of effort into that.

Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

I often force my mind to think that i'm slowing down time at will just to feel awesome (like when walking down the street i try to make the all cars slow down).

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

after seeing toy story, and watching that toys moved and talked to each other when the humans werent around, thinking that toys are really like that when you gone, and when you go back to you room, the toys rush back into their spots.

You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

Whenever I do something I want to tell someone about, I have to whisper it to myself before I tell them.

Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.