I make a joke and laugh a little but if someone else laughs then i laugh louder

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Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

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Rereading a text message 25 times before you send it to make sure it makes sense.

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See someone thats so hot all you can think about is seeing them naked all day.

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While waiting for my food ot cook, I'll wash the dirty dishes that I used so that I don't need to wash lots of dishes after I eat.

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wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

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watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

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Spinning around to get dizzy, then spinning the other way to try and undo it.

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stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

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sing really loud to songs in the car, but stop when people are right next to you at stoplights.

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Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

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Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

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I always feel a little twinge of regret when I see "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service," because I know it's a lie.

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Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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Only use the left earphone.

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

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I shove food in my face like an animal when I'm home alone instead of eating like a normal person.

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When an awkward situation arises, pull out my phone and aimlessly flip through the apps to pretend I'm busy doing something

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Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

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if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

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Sometimes cringe at the sound when other people scratch themselves

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Walking down the toy isle in the store, and feeling a little sad that you're not a kid anymore.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.