I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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Massive hang-over. Say out loud and promise I will never drink like that again. Next time drink atleast as much as the last time.

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If I see a shriveled, dried leaf while walking along the sidewalk I am compelled to step on it and make it crunch.

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you wonder if things look the same through other peoples eyes

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"????????? ???? ?????! ??? ?? ???????? UH1 HUEY!!! ??? ?? ???????? ??????? ??????????? ?????, ????????? ?? ??????? ? ??????????????? ???????!!! ?????? ????, ???????????????? ?? ???????, ?? ?????? ??????? ?? ????! ???? ???????????? ???????, ????? ??????? ???? ??? ?????????, ? ??????????? ?????, ??? ????????? ??????? ??????????? ?????!!! ? ??? ?? ????? ???? ??????? ??????????? ??????????. ???????? ????????,???? ????, ??? ??????? ?????? ??? ????? ??? ????? ???? ? ??????. "

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Have a fantasy where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart while Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum.

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Drink a huge amount of water only for the pleasure of having your stomach filled with it.

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Imagine that other people see colors different from me and if i had their brain i would see it like them

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Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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not eating the ends of a hotdog.

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Open Fridge, look around for few seconds, say to self - 'What the f*** am I doing?'

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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Tap different rythyms with my fingers and keep doing it over and over until the rythym ends on the last finger

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when you dont know what someone said so you just awkwardly start laughing and it turns out not to be funny.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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Getting really ticked off when Wikipedia tells you the ending of a book in the introduction. And the thing is that you don't even see it coming! Ex. My Sister's Keeper is about a family struggling with its own internal problems, especially with the oldest daughter having leukemia and the youngest is the only one who may or may not save her. *name* dies in the end. WTF?

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Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

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Look at a friend and realize that you have forgotten their name...

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i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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Create a little story/scenario in your head abbout someone you like or want to meet, while lying to go to sleep.

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Being all alone in your house and your mind starts to believe its haunted.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.