Pretend my life is a videogame.

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Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

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Thinking about how fast you blink and how many times you have blinked. You then start blinking too much because you are thinling about yourself blinking, and you try to stop, but you can't stop thinking about it.

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realize you are saying your thoughts outloud.

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I have an irrational fear of sloths

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Sometimes I make awkward eye contact with strangers. And I quickly look away. And then I look back. And then look away again. And I keep being compelled to stare awkwardly at the random stranger for no reason.

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sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

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Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

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ur parents never pay attention to u but when they do they r yelling at u

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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Promise to save money then spends all of it anyway.

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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I poop on the side of my house in the morning so I do not have to make noise then come back in.

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Cry every day just because it makes you feel better.

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When I'm watching an episode of a show that I've seen before with a friend, I say a part that is coming up ahead and act like I guessed.

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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When you sit down to a great dinner with all your favorite foods and then the nanosecond your ass touches the chair you are instantly he most tired and uninterested in food than you have ever been before

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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I wish I can go somewhere where there is no influences trying to get me to buy a product or be a certain way

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Sometimes when my mom is aking me something and then i tell her the truth i start smirking automatically as if i'd be lying because i don't know how to make a serious face

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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Set Fire to the Rain

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.