Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

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when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

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When on a sidewalk I always try to make my last step on the block with my left foot.

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At the gym, I always try to do 5 pounds more than the previous person.

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I pee in the water of the toilet to make bubbles

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I poop on the side of my house in the morning so I do not have to make noise then come back in.

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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eat the salt from the bottom of the pretzel bag

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In britain,everytime i see a magpie i got to do this silly ritual and salute and say good morning mr magpie (depending on wat time of day it is) and make sure 2 ppl see it at the same time or something bad will happen.then someone will tell me another one i should do and i add it on! Its never ending.

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Check the time on my cell phone, put it back in my pocket. Dammit, didn't see the time. Check it again.

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tell everyone that you think that mcdonalds is unhealthy and that you think there food is nasty but in reality you actually love it.

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I see some one I have a crush on in the hallway and I walk towards them and brush my arm against them and be like OMG I TOUCHED HER!

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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When no one is around I make sound effects for everything I do.

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I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

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Stalk people on facebook, find out something interesting, and later claim that it 'came up on your newsfeed'.

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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Every time i get a new video game i read the back of the case and the pamphlet the whole ride home

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Start to do homework online, end up on facebook :/

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After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

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I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

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I apologize, when i bump against things.

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Afraid to do something your crush is doing so they don't think you're stalking them, even though you really want to. -B

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while talking about someone, immediately fear they are somehow listening

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.