Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

I piss in the bed every night

Read this site's posts, think of something awesome to write but then forget it because you decided to read more and finish the page rather than write it immediately.

watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

I imagine myself dying in the worst possible way more than once a day. I don't know...today, I was driving on a bridge and all I could picture was it collapsing and falling onto me, When I'm lying in bed, I imagine my ceiling fan toppling me.

When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

Accidentally make a weird noise and quickly turn around frantically to see if anyone else hear it.

When I was younger I would image a band that played the songs on the radio that was strapped to the roof of the car during long car rides.

When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

I don't read the terms of service.

Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

Wondering where are famous people and what they are doing at this exact moment.

I wonder if elections are rigged?

See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

Having a deja vu, swearing you've seen something before.

I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

Start to do homework online, end up on facebook :/

Your mom

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.