When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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When you sit down to a great dinner with all your favorite foods and then the nanosecond your ass touches the chair you are instantly he most tired and uninterested in food than you have ever been before

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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I wish I can go somewhere where there is no influences trying to get me to buy a product or be a certain way

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Sometimes when my mom is aking me something and then i tell her the truth i start smirking automatically as if i'd be lying because i don't know how to make a serious face

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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Set Fire to the Rain

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If I turn in a circle I have to turn the other way to balance it out and feel even!

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If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

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I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

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sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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Seeing someone gettin roasted for something and then making sure you dont do the same thing.

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I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

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getting a random wedgie when everybody is looking at me

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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Thinking about what you want to dream about while brushing your teeth at night.

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when i'm in a really good mood i think everybody is watching and admiring me

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When I hear a sound that I don't know what is, while I'm in an unfamiliar place, I wipe off and then touch as many surfaces as possible. It makes me think that if I'm taken by some scary person, my fingerprints will be easily found. I'm not sure why that would help in many cases, but it makes me feel better.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.