Gotta sleep with a fan.

Take baths

Pretending I'm in a phone call when I don't want someone to talk to me.

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

Count how long it takes before you stop peeing.

Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

Having leg bounce up and down for no reason at all.

When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

Feel like you sing wonderfully when you are alone, but feel like you sing horribly in front of others.

Use the 0.3141592653589793238462643383279502884 second rule

Ladies ; wear the thin underwear with the really skinny jeans & pants , & save the thick underwear for the baggy jeans & sweatpants ..

I piss excellence, shit suppority and whip myself with greatness.

If I'm home alone, I tell myself good night when I am getting cozy in bed. I even use my name.

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

I mean Diana Ross.

Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.