Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

you know that when things have only one like on this site, the people who wrote it liked it

Text random people saying I'm pregnant

Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

I'm a female. Sometimes I pee in the shower just so that I can try to aim my pee at the drain. This way I can imagine what it's like to pee with a doodle.

I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

I think about other women when having sex

i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

I got a lot of high rated entries, but they dont contain Moral: This.

When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.