I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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I chew around the center of carrots.

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when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

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When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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I sometimes put posts not just of things I do but also of things I know other people do

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Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

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When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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Pee in the shower

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When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

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Trying on other people's clothes at the gym/laundromat when they ain't looking!! (^_^)

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When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

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When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

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THINK OF SOMETHING WEIRD YOU DO TO PUT ON THIS WEBSITE ONLY TO END UP FORGETTING IT BEFORE YOU GET ON THE COMPUTER

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Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.