- Things You Think Only You Do

Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

While in bed, I cover my head with my bed sheets because it makes me feel safe from monsters.

humiliating little girls

listen to madonnas new album

You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

fall asleep in the shower.

i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

When I was younger I'd lay in bed & think about who I would pick if a person told me that I had to choose between 2 people and the 1 that I don't choose will die.

Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.