- Things You Think Only You Do

Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

humiliating little girls

When your alone in the house you walk around naked even though there is no point

I play video games with the controller under the covers.

Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

Listening to more obscure music in a public place and turning it up in hopes that someone will ask you what you're listening to and you can tell them about it/open their minds.

Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.

Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.