When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

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We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

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I like making subliminal messages (givemeyourmoney)

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when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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blink

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I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

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You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

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I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

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i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

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Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

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Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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k. everyone

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imagine a bunch of girls are watching you at home, so you don't look like a dumbass

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After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

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When I listen to certain songs,it makes me feel awsome :D I listen to alot of LinkinPark -Briarwoodninja

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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that movie-like moment when you want to rush out to dance in the rain

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.