When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

Does anyone else look at people when there talking and then randomly get in on there conversation.

Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

sitting in your room at night and making imagineary monters or random figures out of things in your room.

Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Singing alone in the car and then stopping, scared that there is an audio recorder in the car recording you singing.

If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

Have a dream that you can breath under water and wake up and be very disappointed

feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.