Feels my beard with my tongue.

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Mouth words to people wearing headphones to try and get them to take them off.

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

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sitting in the passenger seat of the car, move my head around gently to guide a piece of dirt on the window in the foreground around the obstacle course of trees, streetlights etc in the background. Also, imagine my eyes are projecting lasers which cut through anything and carve the passing world up to my design.

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I don't read the terms of service.

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Reading all these posts and being reminded that we are all more similar to each other than we think, regardless of whatever group each of us may belong to.

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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I hid money in a jar behind a brick in the house I lived in and forgot about it. I've since moved to another state but I didn't remember I left the cash behind until years later.

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

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Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

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Think about Facebook chats when your offline!? P.S Am I the only one, REALLY!

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Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

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I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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Wonder if life is just a dream then get a creepy feeling and immediately think happier thoughts.

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.