don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

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Having gay sex

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

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Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

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Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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I never feel bored

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Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

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moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

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Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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I got a lot of high rated entries, but they dont contain Moral: This.

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

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At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

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When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

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I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.