Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

thumb_up thumb_down -87

Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

thumb_up thumb_down -109

putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

thumb_up thumb_down -117

when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

thumb_up thumb_down

When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

thumb_up thumb_down -50

When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

pretend your on the phone talking to someone to make you look like you not a loner

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

thumb_up thumb_down -60

listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word

thumb_up thumb_down -66

When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

thumb_up thumb_down -90

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.