Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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You pretend to fight imaginary people while no ones looking:/ But you look like the star wars kid...

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

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whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

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I always feel as if someone is always watching me on a screen where ever I am, and every person in the world is also being watched as well

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

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When in a public toilet, I never leave the cubicle until everyone is either out of the room or in their own cubicle.

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

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When your alone in the house you walk around naked even though there is no point

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Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

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I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.