Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

Having gay sex

Run the shower before you get in/ move out the way of the water to let it warm up first

get annoyed when the pop-up lid on the dish soap bottle is left up

sometimes when i'm talking to myself and someone walks in the room i have to make them believe what i'm saying is a song!!

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

I got a lot of high rated entries, but they dont contain Moral: This.

Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

Take pieces of loose hair and keep it in a plastic bag in my wallet so if I ever get killed and my ID stolen, my body can still be identified.

Kill Jb without getting aressted.

Thinking your life is a movie...

I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.